13 10 23    Hackattacks, the News, Public Services (inc. CCRC howler), Crime, the decease of Michael Gambon.
27 10 23    The middle east, social reality, the environment.
04 01 24    Back to the point; on the sick? emended: 06 05 24
25 01 24    Death of Tom Wilkinson, More hacking.
08 02 24    MacroCyberCrime.
17 02 24    Adieu Alexei Navalny.
22 02 24    Hacking, but hacking, and cutting and pasting, and more damning stories about the Health Trust.
25 02 24    The plot thickens.
28 02 24    Hacking again.
06 03 24    Online Study.
24 03 24    Campaign to investigate 8000 odd unexpected deaths and consider corporate manslaughter charges against the Health Trust.
08 04 24    About official mismanagement of my father's decease and some anomalies in computer records.
14 04 24    Education, Education, Education (pass the sick bag) ......
16 04 24    Personal overview, Ireland again?
22 04 24    Obviously utterly ludicrous and barking mad.
06 05 24    Back to practicalities
26 11 24   
14 12 24   
18 12 24   
29 12 24   

My first entry for this year is going to commence with a few observations about press stories that unfortunately substantiate a view of public service failure. There really is not anything much in it for me, and I do not want to feel that I have to say it, but recent news stories are corroborating my arguments about public services in depth, breadth, and detail. I feel I should hasten to immediately reiterate that I really do not have that much interest in tasteless, gleeful descriptions of what can unfortunately all too arguably at best be viewed as symptomatic of a sinister and dysfunctional chaos. Many of the acquaintances I have had serious associations with since the nineties will recall my stating emphatically that “the world will mad” once it had become uncompromisingly apparent that instantaneous global communications capability was very swiftly going to replace the world of five channels of tv and a half dozen major daily newspapers which had largely fashioned the public mindset on various issues since WW2. I have to admit that I am in relevant and practical terms more interested in trying to analyse what I also theorised about the assertion it would become a great leveller, this in respect of the fact that anyone would be able to instantly post their own ‘fake news’ effectively anywhere: also in particular respect of the fact I always felt it only required the circulation of a very few facts about my free legal representation to outrage taxpayers and elicit a very significant legal exoneration.

It is very much to the point to relate that I am surely not the only person who needs public services to function at least approximately in line with their intended purpose, it being the case relatively few of us can afford to pay cash for educational, medical, and legal services. The logical question is from my own point of view, that since there seems to be some significant official admission that these are in a state of crisis, why in respect of various controversies relating to my own personal history, are police and social services being take so seriously when their competence and professionality are the subject of such howls of outrage and indignation from within their own ranks.

Whilst it is possible to look at the issues from various perspectives, it being the case for example that war and disease for which public servants cannot quite reasonably be directly blamed have impacted the functioning of the state in recent years, it is an irresistible observation that the story breaking about a Mancunian Andrew Malkinson who served seven years for a Rape he did not commit, and another ten for protesting his innocence before contradictory DNA evidence ’came to light,’ seems highly symbolic of what I have been trying to put across about my local force and associated public services, in particular reference to the failure to appreciate the sinister behaviour of a younger paternal half-brother over many years, though it should really be said that his story was merely another chapter in an endless narrative of misapprehension and failure: what is of opining loudly that these should have been correctly appraised over half a century ago now.

Senior Guardian Reporter Emily Duggan's Malkinson case article of August 15th 2023

As far as the functioning of the legal system in general is concerned and concerning, it is an interesting perspectual story that the East Anglian Daily Times reported on July 22nd this year, the police comment that there was "no other suspect" in the case of Doctor Robert Jones who has recently died, and was as far as I can work out, widely thought to have murdered his wife Diane back in the early eighties. They were known to have been having serious relationship problems but no actual evidence linked him to the body once it was found: as far as I know it is interestingly the case that Roman Law would in such a case have allowed for conviction on the basis that any other conclusion was too absurd.

One does occasionally hear of African-American innocents being fished out of jail after decades of protesting their lack of guilt but that is not of so much concern to UK voters and taxpayers. The simple mind boggling horror of what happened to Mr Malkinson cannot possibly be overstated!

What I want to know is whom was responsible and what censures (if any) are they going to face? There have in recent weeks months and weeks been a further peppering of news stories about police corruption and police failure in the national media; the Met in particular is undergoing a lot of recriminatory self examination and it is to be expected this will continue for some years. In seeking to explain the phenomenon I tend to suggest that an habitual acceptance of a sort of pseudo-moralism is significantly to blame and this of course goes with the present media preoccupation with what has become known as 'wokism.' I think politically serviceable moral questions are a far more difficult matter to appraise or adjudicate than seems to be typically suggested, and tend to proffer that rather than being a legitimate facet of political and social progressivism, the controversy over 'wokism, is in fact a right wing plot to keep people talking nonsense so that any real credible sort of social justice issue will be cast in a disreputable light. For instance I consider the suggestion that someone can genuinely change their gender to be absurd; I don't think anyone can change their gender any more than they can change their ethnic group. So called trans-people are nothing more than cross dressers using chemical supplements to make their altered gender appearance appear more real.

It is not real, meaningful or worthwhile social justice to make an issue out of any particular interest group; as I have said many times, we are treading on thin ice when we commence talking about more or better civil rights for a particular sort of citizen. The real issue in the UK is the fact that citizens do not have any real statutory rights unless some approved lawyer character decides that one does and it always requires money not actual innocence. I am sure it is a great personal tragedy for many besides myself who might have led economically active, creative and productive lives, to find that there's nothing there but this brick wall of lawyers demanding impossible sums for any kind of problem solving when setting out into adult life.

Stories like this by Lydia Chantler-Hicks for the London Evening Standard about the jailing of a Met safer schools officer for statutory rape very much support the particular remark I have consistently sought to make, that not only are we putting too much faith in records of individuals that have been compiled, we are also neglecting to consider that above all things it is possible to analyse both old and new information more effectively than ever before. The individual in question looks almost painfully young for such a role and had committed the offences prior his becoming a Met Officer. It is probably quite arguable that he is a victim of double standards to some extent in view of the fact e.g. a significant proportion of the younger urban population have probably ignored the statutory age limit which was originally Victorian legislation designed to shield adolescents from pimps and procurers. I proposed some years ago that it might not be that bad an idea for the age to be lesser if conducted with parental consent and it is interestingly and relevantly the case for example that some societies reckon the age of consent differently according to the age of both parties which does in fact make reasonably good sense. It is not so much a comment about sexuality but about attitudes to statutory law and what happens when laws are routinely disregarded. Prince Andrew hasn't shown much sign of any contrition about his links with organised prostitution/crime and has in fact been rather seen to have been bellyaching on about various censures imposed on him. I'm not sure what that all adds up to as for example most of the principal figures caught up in the Epstein scandal were of Jewish background and it occurred alongside the rise of the Catholic Donald Trump to the US Presidency. What is e.g. of the suspicion that many of his supporters are associated with holocaust denial and neo nazism: there will always be those who are willing to sell themselves to escape poverty and there will always be others willing to facilitate it.

This story by Vikram Dodd for the Guardian on August 22nd about a met officer's conviction for rape is a bit more serious in that it clearly demonstrates that the force is willing and able to ignore what doesn't suit them even when it comes to quite serious sorts of crime. Perhaps the most serious story about the force apart from the conviction of Wayne Couzens for the rape and murder of Sarah Everard, concerns another life sentence imposed on David Carrick another met officer who had pleaded guilty to 85 serious offences including 48 rapes, Guardian story by Vikram Dodd and Emine Sinmaz on February 7th.

Back in March a retiring local Inspector stated in the East Anglian Daily Times in entirely unqualified terms that the system “wasn’t fit for purpose,” which I have definitely noticed. Comments about challenging behaviours and changing the culture are really just meaningless cliches without a considerable amount of detailed elucidation, but the simple straightforward admission that the criminal justice system definitely is not functioning as it should is a welcome piece of candour as far as I am concerned. I am not entirely unsympathetic toward those who have a very difficult and complex role to play, and I think it quite clear that we’re expecting too much of many other public servants besides policepersons. It seems odd that she should talk about "the role" when cops play many different roles: there are cops that are soldiers; cops that are detectives; cops that are clerks; cops that are social workers; cops that are scientists and so on are there not? Whatever the individual's view the contention has to be that the system is highly dysfunctional and that millions of so called crimes should be considered from different perspectives and/or administered by new systems.

The simple problem seems to be that from the general public's point of view, millions of recorded crimes each year are apparently not being managed effectively: at least not in terms of long term conceptual strategy. Among the more obvious and frequently heard criticisms of the present system is that professional and habitual criminals learn how to effectively manipulate it, and I daresay that many will agree that what is needed is something more streamlined and functional. It may also be quite true that many serving in the force would agree that they would prefer to be rewarded for preventing crime and forestalling social problems than for arresting people after the law has been broken and having to then plough through mountains of paperwork in victimising odd statistics to little good purpose for society in general. As far as the particular controversy about rape crimes is concerned I am surprised it has not been proffered that this is an unusually difficult thing to genuinely substantiate, because among other things people do play games around the specific issue of consent, often do actually say the opposite of what they mean in all sorts of situations, and often genuinely change their minds. I think the government might do well to point this out more often, in particular respect of the fact that the burden of proof has to be high. Blackstone's motto has been oft quoted since the 15th century, to the effect that it is "better that ten guilty men escape than that one innocent suffer." This maxim is found in many religions and in the writings of the founding father's of the United States. I tend to put it that even a state of the art supercomputer would have trouble unpicking the fact of a genuine rape given these facts about human behaviour, and that it might be better advice to choose one's company more carefully than to rely on law enforcement in the way our contemporary, consumerist, social media culture encourages or allows for.

According to the government's Office for National Statistics Crime Survey for England and Wales (CSEW) estimates for the year ending March 2023, people aged 16 years and over experienced 8.7 million offences. This was a 15% decrease compared with the pre-coronavirus (COVID-19) pandemic year ending March 2020 (10.2 million offences). Police recorded crime in England and Wales in the year ending March 2023 exceeded pre-coronavirus pandemic levels. The 6.7 million crimes recorded were 11% higher compared with the year ending March 2020 (6.1 million offences). This overall increase was largely influenced by rises in the offence categories that are most subject to changes in reporting and recording practices; these estimates should therefore be treated with caution as they are unlikely to reflect a genuine increase in crime. At the risk of sounding repetitive I think it quite obvious that law and order problems are not entirely the fault of policepersons and that a radical shakeup of how we consider the problem of crime should be considered. Among other things the present structure of the criminal justice system in this country is centuries old. The system of magistrate court prosecution cannot possibly be dealing properly or effectively in any real sense with so many reported crimes, and e.g. the notion that individuals need to have a government funded legal aid lawyer in every case is one which really belongs to a time when the average person could not read and write effectively. Lawyers of one sort or another are vampirishly draining the nation of significant fortunes whilst adding nothing of any useful sort of value to it; they, as do cops and crooks, seek to make money from crime, and many don't realise they have no compunction about sowing catastrophic misunderstanding in order to do so.

This story about the misuse of body cameras as reported by Emily Duggan for the Guardian this year tends to suggest that officers are haplessly extemporising when faced with millions of reported crimes each year. I recall it interestingly a fact that these were made compulsory at about the time that the Suffolk force lied about events in relation to an incident in a local pub in 2010: I repeat that I have had no legal advice that I know of in relation to the incident, that I was sexually assaulted by several people in being held down and subjected to a lengthy not so simulated assrape when I tried to leave, and that the local paper has printed a load of lies about my knocking some landlady's teeth out.

The local Rag is arguably surprisingly good at making errors, someone last year claimed a newly refurbished Felixstowe pub was Suffolk's most southerly which is absurd and empty headed to say the least, there are numerous pubs on the south side of the Orwell Estuary, I make Suffolk's most southerly the Brantham Bull: this recent typo was also a bit of an eye popper.

As far as comments go about mental health, crime and associated social/societal issues at a local level, for now I am going to have to leave a few comments about this recent article from the East Anglian Daily Times because it really is very telling in respect of vastly differing assumptions apparently being made in the Media about the future of the NHS.

I should add by way of a minor emendation that Jack Abbott is presently the Labour candidate for the Borough of Ipswich at the next general election and that he writes occasional articles for the EADT rather than being of the EADT. What is without going into detail, of the remark that he makes many questionable presuppositions about this arm of the NHS. His prognosis for the service is all too arguably so preposterously overoptimistic it sends shivers down my spine to think someone might find it credible; it reads more like a nursery school fairy tale than a serious vision for the future of public services and whom exactly is going to pay for it I ask you? Any kind of public service has to be paid for! In order for this to happen, people have to engage in economic activity, sell goods and services so they can then pay taxes to the Treasury without which doctors, teachers, road makers, waste management engineers and policepersons cannot be paid. Mr Abbott might do better to dissert meaningfully on the nature of the economy and government income than to make vague, emotive ideological pronouncements about what citizens should be able to expect in the way of public services. There is no god given reason as to why the UK pound should be worth so much more than say the Mexican peseta or the Malaysian Ringit and I cannot help but think that national society would be much better served by the presentation of useful and relevant information than by what is all too arguably little more than wishful thinking and progressive social propaganda.

The statistical facts about the local Health Trust make fairly grim reading as statistical facts often can, but the huge numbers of GPs who have signed a no confidence petition in the local mental health services is highly unusual and significant by any standard. Offhand I am tempted to suggest police need a simpler rationale for the complex array of tasks which modern society presents, and that the scope of the state’s mental health services within the mixed economy of the modern state requires definition on some basis that commands comprehensible consensus since we do hear so much about postcode lottery quality questions and so forth. It surely cannot be that difficult to devise theoretical alternative frameworks with the idea in mind of simply making things work without concern for traditions and preconceptions.

Michael Searles Daily Telegraph article comments on an independent auditor finding in June this year that the local trust had lost track of patient deaths.

It so happens to be a fact that the last time I entrusted a friend to their care, he was dead within hours, so my serious concerns are far from entirely selfish.

It springs to mind that William Pitt the Younger had much trouble persuading the state to restructure and stake everything on investment in battleships after the American and French revolutionary wars. It should not either be that difficult to reconsider the role and shape of the health service with a view perhaps to resolving vastly differing assumptions; there’s something mysteriously quaint and vaguely sinister about the fact for instance that fifteen per cent of the adult population are said to be taking antidepressants. Aside from the fact these drugs are also getting into the water and affecting the growth and development of various flora and fauna, I think it obviously open to the accusation it is a hugely flawed paradigm. What do we mean when we refer to mental health? I think people have hugely varying ideas, but I don’t think in principle that mind altering drugs are any real remedy for unhappy or malfunctioning people. I noted that on May 15th this year Kate Muggleton stirred up a mini furore when she questioned the institutionalisation of mental health in stating her view that emotions should not be “over medicalised.” She went on to say, “I've learnt a huge amount and then you go down into fields of philosophy, as well as psychology and neuroscience.” It seems not unreasonable to add, as far as preposterous claims of wealth and deserving that have entered the social and political narrative since Tony Blair accepted notions of what became understood as 'aspirationalism' are concerned, that she at least occasionally has the decency to look quite thoroughly ashamed of herself, and I can't help thinking that Churls Windbag aka the King, would do well to reflect carefully on this with particular consideration to the systemic failure of our political system and the perceived lack of honesty in public life. It seems a matter of some concern that he wants to try and act out the traditional role of the monarch in acting as an informal sort of behind the scenes arbiter of parliamentary debate, but it seems all too well substantiated that whilst he does have two sons Harry isn't one of them: that's rather a serious little oversight as far as such ambitions are concerned because above all things if they are to be realised some sort of real honesty is an indispensable prerequisite ...............

Rebecca English's Daily Mail Article reports her comments in more depth.

Much as I am not quite so interested in an investigation into the human mind as I am in wanting to find a Health Service that can recognise accurate information and interpret it correctly, I do think she points very much in the right direction as far as necessary public debate is concerned. Saying that when we make value judgements about how and to what extent the state should have some responsibility in the matter of its citizens health and welfare in various respects, we are inevitably considering a wide range of fields including philosophy and morality, is not really a complex proposition, in that it is simply correct and in my view overwhelmingly needs to be said. Those who were critical of the suggestion she ought not to question so called experts are rather ignoring widespread complaints about them, as well as the remark that study of the human mind is very much an explorative area of science, not one which has hard and fast rules in the way that physics or mathematics does which many erroneously tend to assume. In my view treatments should also be considered highly questionable and speculative, and really ought rather to acknowledge that overpopulation and a degraded unnatural environment inevitably leads to behavioural dysfunction in individuals and populations: what is unfortunately of the remark this cannot genuinely be remedied except by improvements in environmental conditions whether social, intellectual, material or purely environmental. Such facts as that there are millions laid off long term with various sorts of mental health issues and a huge proportion of the population are also taking anti-depressants, are problems which really need to be addressed at a societal level; I don't believe we can reasonably expect clinicians to devise real medical solutions for such issues and the notion we can is in my view an example of flawed reasoning and self justifying institutionalised thinking.

It might not be exaggerated to say the kind of overvaluing of institutionalised preconceptions we tend to have about the NHS have arguably contributed to such cases as Harold Shipman and Lucy Letby apparently losing their enthusiasm for keeping people alive. It seems a sinister but unavoidable question as to whether GPs are raising the question of hostile intent or sentiment at a societal level by the manner in which the word 'purpose' is used in the GP’s petition about the Norfolk and Suffolk Health Trust. One tends to assume when people are disappointed with their medicine for one reason and another, that simple misunderstanding or the misdirection of good intent is to blame. What is for example of observing that there are many Tories in Norfolk and Suffolk who are fairly well rehearsed in their beliefs about people on the sick all being a shiftless and worthless bunch of characters cynically preying on the public purse as part of demanding acceptance of causative explanations for economic success. One cannot help but wonder as to whether or not a politically polarised view of NHS scope and provision has left those in such right-wing shire counties exposed to a systemic and systematic ill will in some noticeable respect if treatment can be so convincingly associated with fatality: dead welfare claimants are after all far more fiscally convenient for other people than those extant. Dr Dan (Death) Paltry, sorry Poultry, no Poulter, is perhaps the senior Tory MP in the County and I tend to suggest this is very arguably incompatible with his role in mental health services.

Mathew Weaver's Article for the Gruaniad details similar defensive managerial tactics to the Letby case in respect of some dozens of recent deaths at the Sussex NHS Trust which it seems were arguably driven by a dangerous blend of ambition and economy. The article raises interesting questions for policymakers in its description of NHS prioritisation in respect of the fact for instance, that much as we might like the idea of an NHS, it leads to such propaganda soundbites as ‘free at the point of use,’ and besides increasingly valid looking question marks about quality and institutionalisation, we have to ask where is the line going to be drawn? It is after all not at all feasible to spend vast sums keeping a particular individual alive for a few more weeks or days whenever possible despite it being correct according to principles of moral absolutism.

13 10 23

I’m still wondering why it is that I have been subjected to so many hackattacks in recent years and it remains an ongoing matter. It seems many emails have been repeatedly tampered with in recent months and I haven't gotten any closer to diagnosing similar mischiefs that have been inflicted on the website since 2017. Whoever it is must be one very sick puppy! What possible motive could anyone have for causing such misery and confusion I wonder? I really was relying on these webpages to substantiate and corroborate various comments I have now made over many years; finding my digital resources ruined is really a loss of amounting to decades of work. It might yet prove counterproductive to any conceivable purpose that such sabotage might have been intended to serve. I can recall at about the turn of the millennium I was finding when I encountered new media that it did seem to improve my hearing but didn't also seem to have found me personally: one can never tell what the effects of such tampering might be e.g. 'the Streisand effect.' I seemed to have been oddly mistaken for another person or persons somehow. This was probably why I never bothered to learn anything about facebook, instagram, twitter or anything such. I know some of the jokes I've made aren't all that good, especially the one about Angela Merkel which is admittedly in very bad taste, but (hacking aside) I think I can safely promise they're going to improve. The site frontispiece with Ted Heath and Jimmy Savile is unfortunately not altogether a joke, especially if you're among those citizens who have tried to abide by laws regulating social behaviour, but rather a question about crime and social reality.

"Hyurr at Hahaharbottle and Arbuthnot we pried ahhselves on manyofactchurring the finest Mongol scratchings you can buy anywhere in the yookay today, (crunch crunch crunch). For are signature product we select only the youngest, tenderest, juiciest Downs Syndrome victims (crunch crunch crunch)! Each, is individually disembowelled before being hung and smoked for a full three weeks to ensure the very best flavour experience. (crunch crunch crunch). Harbottle and Arbuthnot...... when only the best will do. "

I am thinking in terms of how to compose an interesting dialogue on domestic social, political and economic events as they might seem to relate to my personal problems with lawyers, dentists and public services which is obviously a quite complex and difficult thing to achieve. It is also a much bigger challenge than that to think of writing something that might actually be of real general interest, or even of relevance to oppressed third world itinerants beyond thinking that westerners are expecting a lot of their social security rights. As far as the gnus goes I am very saddened to hear of the death of Michael Gambon who had become something of an icon of British culture in latter years, his wit and warmth will be sadly missed by the nation in those to come.

Much of national political life has become a sinister dreamlike farce though I always felt that the stability of the pre-internet era as bemoaned by Laura Kuensberg was a contrivance of omissions rather than a genuinely random sort of occurrence. We should not forget that every European country excepting Portugal, Sweden, Spain and Switzerland have been largely overrun by foreign armies during the last hundred years or so, and in re building, have had little choice but to take democracy seriously, whereas a significant undercurrent of understanding of British politics on the part of British voters, I noticed from the Thatcher era, had interpreted political activity as an agreed and organised pretence, a pre-arranged fudge, a means e.g. of avoiding moral and philosophical disputes about the legitimacy of domestic inequality and the UK's post-colonial retention of various assets including odd bits of the globe like Gibraltar and the Falkland Islands, rather than as a motivation for or a consequence of such activity: that is to say in plain English that you cannot genuinely interest people in political discussion if it is really meant to be nothing more than an organised fudge.

In recent weeks there have been a string of unimaginative and uninspiring comments from major figures that betray some sort of distancing from this and other sorts of social reality. Keir Starmer's having mentioned that a new Labour government could re-negotiate the immigration situation with Europe is one example, as several media sources then pointed out that they were already facing a much larger influx of refugees and migrants, and that re-negotiating with them was unlikely to result in a reduction of our own immigration figures.

It seems a bit odd that Suella Braverman should see fit to opine that "multiculturalism has failed" when according to the norms and values of conventional understanding of the issue, logic tends to dictate that having an Indian of colonial Hindu background incumbent to one of the great offices of state is significant evidence that it has not. One has to commend her for being willing to strike at least an odd seriously unconventional and questioning note on the nation's political anomie: in respect of illegal migrants and refugees it seems that we often forget these are really very different things. I fear however that her ambition is rather larger than her insight. I read somewhere recently that she had stranded a British passport holder of South African derivation in Turkey because he had a record for dope dealing (gruesome). For chrissakes Suella get a life! Half the cops and local (inner urban) councillors in the country are nodding and winking away about the trade in (uncontrolled) substances and in many sorts of urban communities, dope dealers long ago replaced the local Pub as the focus of much social activity.

Without wishing to digress from my own immediate and serious problems it might seem appropriate to suggest I'm not the only person who saw the horrific murders of WPC's Nichola Hughes and Fiona Bone at the hands of the demented gangster Dale Cregan in Greater Manchester in 2012, as arising from the conflicting facts that one the one hand many inner city communities have long ago accepted and/or learned to live with drug use as part of daily life, and on the other that national political figures keep reciting their fixed ideas about prohibitive respectability despite all the evidence it is impossible to achieve in anything like its current form.

It really is strange and disturbing that someone as theoretically intelligent as a qualified Barrister should seem so blind to social reality; what kind of nebulous Victorian public school story book did Paella spring out of I wonder? It certainly isn't the kind of thing that's going to impress those red wall voters the Tories badly need to hang onto. Many are sick of hearing about how drugs cause crime when the more logical argument is that drug prohibition causes crime, because people commit crime to buy drugs on a black market which was caused by prohibition, not by the fact people experiment with drugs which cost almost nothing to produce. Is it possible to imagine a world where people understand and use drugs properly with the phenomenon considered no more sinister or important than that of children's party tricks?

Drug use, abuse, and addiction may arguably be a significant social problem but I think far too many supposedly responsible public figures are trying to ignore the actual facts, which suggest strongly that trying to enforce criminalisation creates another and a much bigger problem. As a matter of fact I heard it authoritatively alleged almost three decades ago that all forms of drug abuse combined only cost the NHS about ten per cent of what alcoholism does and I do think the influence of the drinks industry is evident in the neglected publicising of such statistics. What very much seems to increasingly command consensus is the remark that drug use and abuse should be viewed in a medical context not a legalistic one. I saw a documentary about cocaine smuggling in the port of Antwerp recently wherein it was authoritatively alleged that for all the massive logistical effort being put into the prevention of its importation they were only finding about ten percent of that which it was estimated passes through the port. The camera crew went walkabout in the neighbourhoods adjoining the dock area and elaborated on various symptoms of the widespread ignorance and double standards appertaining its use, and the impossibility of genuinely effective enforcement, with drug paraphernalia and shell casings frequently littered around. This might not be of significant or particular interest to many who perhaps don't have much interest in international news, but it should be of some concern to everyone that for example, it is hardly an exaggeration to say that about half of Latin America and the Caribbean has been in a state of unusually violent turmoil in recent months, and a very significant element of any reasonable causative explanation has to lie in the double standards of first world political establishments insisting that drugs, or perhaps more particularly in this instance cocaine, are bad end of story whilst its social use is very widely not seen in anything like this kind of light by ordinary people, and comment about its accepted use in south American cultures is simply not considered as valid or reasonable somehow: where forgetting to offer someone a coca leaf to chew is considered rude like not offering to make tea when friends call.

It might seem the case in North America where various US states have relaxed drug prohibition policies more particularly in reference to cannabis, that shall we say lower end citizens for want of a better phrase, have then ended up committing more petty crime. This could however be the consequence of various subjective circumstances including a sense of entitlement that is more often a feature of European citizenship concepts having been amplified by pandemic preparations: the policy does seem to have effected a significant drop in homicide rates as far as I can make out.

Another topic on which I thought the Commons' leading lights were but seeing "through a glass darkly" recently was in the question of pensions increases, in that both major parties seemed oblivious to the notion that many OAP's might be willing to accept less of an increase in their allowances if some real acumen could be discerned in the administration of public services on which they rely more than most. I think many Pensioners wanted to be seen to do something meaningful about recent domestic and international crises and of course they're not much good at using social media: surely many are definitely sick of being locked up in old folks' homes and having coins thrown at them.

I think it true to say that we seem to have a rather grand idea of what we can achieve that perhaps derives from the age of Empire when Britain had more relative influence and interest around the globe. I've said before that arguably most of the living have to endure corruption, tyranny and the threat of violence on a daily basis, and that there might come a time when we cannot care for any of those that somehow contrive to appear on UK shores on the basis of a sixty year old human rights convention. Insofar as huge numbers of migrants and refugees have travelled through post Gaddafi Libya, many have commented that it was naive of PM Cameron to have made some apparent presumption that removing the Colonel's tyranny would not lead to a worse kind of anarchy. I don't think of unreasonably seeking to undermine noble intentions and who would, but there has to come a point when we consider some argument this just isn't realistic. Italian led attempts to sponsor an intrafrican response seems a step in the right direction, but the inevitable fact remains that there is no easy answer to the economic inequality and political instability prompting so many to abandon their homelands.

Jeremy Hunt has been making more sense than most when it comes to domestic social policy, but it is becoming inescapable that the Tories are facing an enormous task to retain office at the next general election, and it's a real shame that our dated looking first past the post voting system shows no sign of engendering any real inspiration: Liz Truss has probably written off any chance of a Tory victory but you never can tell. As far as public percipience and shifting sentiment is concerned, I think Labour are rather more capable of losing the next general election than the Tories are of winning it; Labour are very brashly confident that constantly recycled and superficially well intentioned sloganeering about integration, diversity, and immigration, aren't going to blow up in their faces. What is as far as reality is concerned, of insisting that the population of the world's most inhabitable temperate zones are increasingly obviously reaching maximum capacity, with all too plausible environmental and demographic catastrophes looming in every direction. It should be a crime to publish contrary stabilist propaganda about how families are going to find homes, jobs, prosperity and fulfilment in coming generations when the rivers are full of poison and even the air we breathe is full of capitalist growth manufactured crap for which no-one can be held responsible.

Professor Angus Dallies for the Express on April 8th this year lays bare something of the extent to which we are governed by propaganda rather than democracy in a well informed debunking of government vaccine strategy as inherited from the Johnson administration: Rupert Neaten for the Guardian on April 30th reports that the Tax Justice Network has called on King Charles to reform laws allowing industrial scale tax avoidance in Crown dependencies and overseas territories; George Montbiot on March 29th also for the Guardian disserts on the Sunak administration's harmony with fossil fuel companies; also details reasons for the increasing public focus on the condition of the nation's waterways in another informed article of May 3rd; Tom Perkins takes a new look at old pollution issues on Feb23; more recently on September 14th Heather Stewart reports that the government is failing to keep post Brexit investment promises; also in September that the government is failing to keep post Brexit environmental promises. Well that's another big fat surprise isn't it!

TC had been in the news quite a lot prior to her losing the Environment Ministry in PM Sunak's latest cabinet reshuffle. She's one of several Tory MPs whose constituencies border the Town. The extent to which environmental issues have been radicalising the typical reactionary complacency of their electorates (let's not wuwwy about clean air and water we want pwiddy countwyside pitchers) was instanced by the Greens capturing their first district council in the last round of local elections in mid-suffolk. She had clearly been nettled by the extent to which she had been under fire, and had at one point from reading between the lines, arguably dared voters to actually do something about it despite having been overtly seen to be a stalwart opponent of the environmentalist lobby, which has among other things recently been going on about local rivers containing many dozens of times the safe level of bacterial infestation: especially unfortunate if they're designated safe bathing locations.

I understand that the Australian banking organisation which had acquired Thames Water and has been the focus of so much hostility on the part of consumers and environmentalists has been nicknamed the 'vampire kangaroo' in its propensity for amassing debt piles, complaints about services, and rewarding shareholders, which I am authoritatively informed is significantly among other things to do with its ability to avoid taxes by lending to its own subsidiary companies. Such issues will be very much in the minds of discriminating voters as the next general election approaches. As far as the question of economic reform and regulation is concerned, the issue of tax havens and the reasonability of taxing wealth rather than income seems to be significantly on the agenda of the well informed. I myself do think it outrageous that the political establishment has accepted the narrative that water firstly exists for investors to make money with so much disregard for the environment: if anything should be considered a birthright in a civilised country it is access to clean and drinkable water. The observation tends to go with the fact that the Town's Tory MP Tom Hunt has been trying to kick up a fuss about the fact that new multi-storey buildings on the Town's docks which it is alleged were first built by the East Anglian King Raedwald at around the turn of the 7th century, have been erected with considerable contempt for appertaining statutes one way or another.

I suppose I do think the Guardian is about the best free online Newspaper though I don't quite go along with its tacit unquestioning of much of our electoral system in respect of a lack of public confidence in it, and the apparent abandonment of the issue of PR at national level. The better quality right wing newspapers don't tend to publish free online editions in this country. It is simply ridiculous if national debate about democracy is supposed to be serious, that (figures from Wikipaedia) to the nearest whole number at the last general election, it took 38264 Tory votes to elect a Tory MP, 50836 Labour votes to elect a Labour MP, 336038 Libdem votes to elect a Libdem MP, 21057 SNP votes to elect a scottish nationalist MP, and 835597 green votes acquired a solitary MP in the shape of Caroline Lucas. In a real representative democracy according to votes cast at the last general election it should have taken each political party about 49,231 votes to acquire a seat in the legislature.

Thus, in a shall we say a genuinely democratic proportionally representative election the Tories should have had a little over 280 seats, Labour about 210, Libdems maybe 75, SNP about 25, Greens 17, DUP 5, Sinn Fein 3 and the remainder being made up by other Northern Irish parties getting a couple of seats each with Plaid Cymru also getting three: the Tories would have had to agree a coalition with the Libdems to form a government. If such a system had been in place people would obviously have voted differently and probably in greater numbers in that e.g. many who felt a Libdem or Green vote would be a wasted vote, would have gone to the polls or switched allegiance and the quality of debate would have been likely to have improved as voters in non-marginals would actually have had a vote that meant something real. I have heard that many in the US have similar complaints about their presidential electoral college system being out of date and unfit for purpose with different rules in various states: most will have heard that when the college system handed him the presidency Trump was about five million votes or more short of Hillary's total. Many will no doubt opine and with some good reason, that there is little point in worrying about the realities of democratic rhetoric, that it is pointless to try and restrain human greed and iniquity and that these are simply a fact of life. I suppose one good answer to that is that it was misconceptions about and mismanagement of democratic ideals, that propelled both Hitler and Stalin to power with disastrous consequences for what people call civilisation.

I find a lack of any serious implicit critical argument of the British two-party system with reference to the failures of the last Labour government rather evokes a foreboding of smug media liberals spinning pseudo? scientific environmentalism which leads to no real action, and illusory comforting tales about the NHS than it does any sort of prospective confidence in a Labour administration. The lack of real political will to deal with law and order lies, plastics manufacturing, environmentally contemptuous farming, and large scale tax evasion, is quite apocalyptic in scope. I find Keir Starmer evasive and patronising in his manner, even smug, though he's probably right in making the assumption that he's the only alternative to another Tory PM and another Tory government. I was telling a younger friend recently that PR had been significantly more talked about in the seventies, that the liberal leader Jeremy Thorpe had been arguably the most powerful man in the country in 1974 when neither main party could attain an overall majority, and that discussion of PR rather tailed off once Thorpe was actually prosecuted for hiring a hit man to kill an erstwhile gay lover whose dog fatally ended up on the wrong end of a shotgun blast: by the time the legal, political and media establishment had finished massaging the facts one would have thought he had been wrongly issued with a speeding ticket. What is of commenting that despite these facts I am rather surprised to not see more contemporary discussion of the issue since PR could e.g. conceivably do much to obviate such symptoms of discontent as the current low level crime wave and the recurrence of riots with the fall of each Labour ministry. There have been quite a number of reports from retailers about a distinct uptick in lawlessness accompanied by expressions of disconcertment at the ineffectuality of the police and I feel the law and order lobby need something more than another Labour government to genuinely remedy their concerns. At least two major dailies reported in recent weeks that Iceland staff had been infected with AIDS from needles used as weapons, so the issue has arguably moved up to another level. It can however also be surprisingly easy to find conflicting claims about how well or how badly the force is coping with what is taking place and in what way, but retail organisations appear to be quite justified in their concerns about numbers of shopraids.

In returning to the subject of failing public services ...............

Eric Allison, Simon Hattenstone and Owen Bowcott for the Guardian on May 30th report that a group of prominent lawyers claim the official body responsible for investigating alleged miscarriages of justice is not fit for purpose. That does sound familiar, but lawyers have accused the Criminal Cases Review Commission, which decides whether alleged miscarriages of justice should be referred to the court of appeal, of systemic failures. My own experience is now that it is a simple fact this institution is not fit for purpose. The last letter I had from them clearly falls below minimum standards of literacy for it to be at all comprehensible. Its superficial air of intellectuality but actual nonsensicality, clearly marks it out as having been written by an out of his or her depth Indian person. This person one (Mr or Mrs Ishaq?) doesn't even know the difference between an appeal and a retrial, which is rather bad news if you're arguing for either. What is among other things of suggesting that if its quality concerns can be addressed, it ought to have such powers as being able to recommend the quashing of a verdict where evidence is obviously flawed. It is generally full of appalling errors of basic logic in forming a consequential argument and I am hoping to publish explicit details here at some point soon, but I'm arguably hardly less than having to prepare for a paramilitary conflict in protecting my home, personal documents and property.

Emily Dugan on 26th august phrases further dire warnings about the Criminal Cases Review Commission

Also this summer, Daily Telegraph reporters Will Bolton, Charles Hymas and Amy Gibbons examine high level dissatisfaction with the CCRC.

This is the most recent communication I've had from them, which demonstrates among other things that their printer is producing skewed documents. The fact that neither the feedback form nor the pre-paid envelope came with this solitary enclosure, would surely be interpreted by most as very strong circumstantial evidence that they are incompetent, and/or that they have been lied to by dirty cops and scheming lawyers whom have it seems been hiding testimony, evidence and legal advice.

Some further recent observations

The present controversy over so much of our so-called public services has I think deeper causes than the typical sort of hostile orchestration that might be said to accompany the usual spasms of expiring Tory ministries. There's something more atavistically disturbing to the latest round of debates than the usual recriminations about the cost and actual value of public services. Politicians across the spectrum are displaying an institutionalised contempt for the public and for the truth in much of what they say. The political establishment is fairly resigned to our two-party system spitting out another Labour government fairly soon; the party's grandees are busily rubbing their hands together in the expectation of government jobs and have no incentive to reform our so-called dimockeracy. PR obviously would not solve every problem with democracy or government in that as we have seen in other European countries such as Italy, administrations change too rapidly for effective legislative and administrative control to function effectively, as those with the money to actually do things seek to evade the fact of legislative control and levellerist economics: whilst it is probably a fatuous idea what is really needed among the world's political leadership is not so much a willingness to talk about political and legislative systems as something like genuine honesty in social and psychological terms.

In examining the question, it ought not to be forgotten that the Tory party in particular insisted that the Brexit vote leading to a less than three per cent majority would have to be honoured, and then evidenced no qualms about claiming a majority of 43% at the following general election. I don't think people have thought carefully enough about how stupid that actually is, and I don't think there's any real sort of contrition insofar as an empty pretence of democracy may as I say serve some short-term purposes and intents (mostly for the economically successful), but it is for example interpreted very differently in places like Belorussia and Zimbabwe: I'm not in the least bit surprised that people in these places have given up on even a pretence of counting votes properly. I have commented before to the effect that it is strange, we accept such a narrow view of democracy in that there are better more valid criticisms conservatives could make of contemporary consensual politics than resorting to what is called gerrymandering in order to make up a majority that simply is not real. There are plenty of good arguments to the effect that the nation has given away the right to vote in parliamentary elections too readily. It was for instance traditional to give votes to households rather than any adult individual which does in fact make some good sense, but that was undermined by the reaction to mass conscription at around the turn of the 19th century. The fact many men who had risked their lives in the Great War were unable to vote in the country they had fought for was largely what led to the Representation of the People Act in the UK in 1918 which gave all men over the age of 21 and all women over the age of 30 the right to vote in parliamentary elections.

Pointing this out provides a reasonable means of opening some examination of the debate on the role and scope of what is typically termed the welfare state. Movers and shakers on the public debate from various perspectives often seem to have neglected the simple observation that the post-war Attlee government was faced with a highly unusual situation in having a mandate to reconstruct a modern state which has yet to be repeated. Sentiments embodied in its legislative expression tended to reflect the language and thought of a citizen army that had fought all over the globe and been swiftly dispossessed of its arms subsequent to German surrender. Hence what I found in the eighties was that welfare entitlement was defined in fairly absolute terms and that those without money or employment had the right to have rent paid, the idea apparently having been that no-one without money or work should lose their home. A great deal could be said about the manner in which government financial support via various welfare payments has become the modern equivalent of bread and circuses in Roman times but I am going to have to leave that largely aside for the here and now: it is for example an interesting observation that many who have had "crap parents" have some loyalty to the state that otherwise wouldn't exist because it funded them at least some sort of a home.

27 10 23

I don't really want to digress but it is not so much that events in the middle east bring it to mind that my paternal grandfather's military career was very much associated with Palestine from the twenties until the end of WW2 and beyond that prompts some comment, but rather the clear lack of understanding and consensus in the language being exchanged by contrarily disposed factions in their different views of the latest eruption from the Gaza Strip: which is to say among other things there seems little point in expressing views that Israel has a right to defend itself whilst there are as many different views about what Israel is and is not as there are leaves descending in the deepening cool of the English autumn.

I don't blame Arabs and Palestinians for their frustration with diplomacy and distrust of western assurances given in particular the cynical lies that were fed to the peoples of the region when seeking their aid to topple Ottoman influence during the Great War. Whilst much of what has happened in the Levant and further east along the fertile crescent in subsequent years is arguably quite predictable, it remains an endless source of wonder and a fertile field of research for the historian, that the highly singular phenomenon of a people (Jews) exiled from the region by a Roman dynasty approaching two Millennia ago having apparently set out to reclaim the territory whence they were exiled, is actually the real underlying story. Imagine what would happen if attempts were made to boot Europeans out of Australia or North America becoming the causus belli of such a conflict in those places! This is in itself a highly unusual sort of phenomenon in respect of such a curious circumstance as a half-breed race displaced at the whim of a Roman Emperor contesting for territory so many hundreds of years later, in that it is arguably in principle more ludicrous than trying to declare Viking incursions meaningfully illegal and seek compensation.

Saying so prompts the comment that we have in the west and especially in the UK enough post Covid economic problems to worry about and that we should be extremely wary of being drawn into the plausible resurgence of a second major regional conflict on European borders. The military-industrial complex has ground into life in response to Ukrainian events and it is an ill wind that blows nobody any good. Besides the countless appalling human tragedies it inflicts, war costs money, lots, and lots, and lots of money! I think it true that quite a lot of Jewish militants with a mixture of kooky religious and militarist precepts have got an awful lot of big ideas about what Israel should be compared to what it was in say 1948, 1967 or 1995. As far as I know it is not that unfair to say that the Jewish state has not often responded well to attempts to establish consensus around various interests and perspectives in a pluralist framework and that it is arguably all too predictable that we are again witnessing other longtime residents of the region finding themselves prompted to extreme violence.

I don't doubt that you could find varying accounts of Israeli expansion and differing interpretations of reasonably accepted facts but as we see, they have thus far shown they can easily win conflicts against societies whose self determination has been thus tormented by far superior linguistic, economic, military and technical capability of transoceanic Europeans in the post industrial age as plagiarised by the Jewish diaspora. It ought not to be forgotten that Netanyahu and some of the people around him were held responsible for the assassination of Yitzhak Rabin by many senior Israelis including his wife not so long ago.

Guardian correspondent Julian Borger details from Jerusalem on October 22nd that the same shadowy right-wing interests that had orchestrated hate rallies demanding Rabin's death in the 90s continue to terrorise domestic opposition to an aggressive expansionist agenda. This agenda has of course seen widespread protests about attacks on the independence of the judiciary within Israel in recent months with large numbers of army reservists even refusing to serve as a clear demonstration of the deep rift inside the nation as to realistic political perspectives on its future. The turbulence in the region should not be underestimated in its capacity to spark a wider conflict. Wars in Iraq and Syria and the Arab Spring have obviously exerted a massive destabilising influence since Rabin's death signalled at least the short to medium term demise of a conciliatory pluralist vision for the peoples of the Levant.

Owen Jones also for the Guardian details the persecution of public figures for saying almost anything that isn't in tune with Israel's ruling right wing coalition.

This link to an article for the Telegraph by Michael Searles detailing the local NHS Trust's habit of seeking to distort the truth had also been illegally removed!

07 01 24

I hadn't even got round to uploading this one by Andre Levy for the Mail about the squandering of public money on spin doctors by the Trust

It's getting on for twenty years now since I found much to my distaste that there might seem to be some reason to conclude that the story of my sad and sorry looking wannabee liberal one parent father, was distinctly associated with the domestic political events and the outbreak of WW2 as an explanation for a nauseating ordeal of a childhood and various strange social phenomena. Among the plausible ramifications of that possible fact is the suggestion that I have wrongly been thought of as being consciously involved in the scripting of political progress and political activity. What is of the fact e.g. that among suspects for the perpetration of such misery as has been inflicted by the hacking of my online activity is a neighbour involved in forensic science work with the local police, whose wife (act your age and not your shoe size) happens to work for the Suffolk Trust which has been recently declared unfit for purpose by 140 General Practitioners and many other interested parties within its jurisdiction. I had for example taken no pleasure in having to spell out for him that his distinguished war veteran grandfather (who seems to have had a very singular reputation and as far as I could make out had been widely liked) hadn't been cleverly drawn into such a working script about politics and society, but had rather been suckered by levellerist wannabees whom I had thought were in everyone's best interest going to oversee my being independently housed at the earliest possible age, away from my father's mysterious and haplessly dysfunctional intrigues: he (the forensic scientist), seems to have suggested that a Labour agitator or agitators by the name(s) of Mackay was responsible for this. I really would have liked to have been the author of a good script to complement his grandfather's reputation but there were essential elements missing from the recipe for such a story: most obviously the girl.

He is not quite the top of my suspect list however: a maternal half brother to whom I have been trying to talk sensibly about the doings of his parents is highly capable of the same sort of tricks as he's a computer science graduate. He has been in general (as have his two siblings) unreasonably (now that they're adults) trying to avoid a discussion of his moral responsibility as their eldest child in respect of their conduct in what they related to a lawyer (Anthony Smythe of Bates Wells and Braithwaite) in 1985. Having actually gotten hold of him on the phone recently I was treated to a violent threatening tirade and I would have said it a reasonable suspicion he had intentionally been trying to direct a violent sort of ventriloquism over my attempts to conduct various generally reasonable sorts of conversation, and he might not be the only person making such attempts.

If the premise about my father's family in the thirties is generally correct then suspects may include politicians of various countries who have found things going wrong with their scripts; I was attacked online by Donald Trump in 2012 (no mistaking the white trash syntax) accusing me of eulogising Woodrow Wilson and of being an anarchist. Many people including myself do think of Wilson as one of the great US presidents and despite his pro segregationism, admire the selfless internationalist philosophy which arguably more than anything else gave the US such a singular role in the modern world, but I hadn't said anything at all about the US or US presidents, and I'm only an anarchist in the sense that in many respects it seems a benevolent sort of chaos is all too often the best that can be expected of the English speaking political establishment, as the only obviously apparent alternative is a tyranny of one sort or another which seems to evolve from misconceptions about what democracy is and is not: I think he was trying to nobble Hillary and went for the wrong window in mIRC. I have frequently mentioned to various parties in recent years that freedom of speech and association is, or at least has been significantly a reality in the western world because millions have died in seeking to make it so, and that perhaps above all things this overwhelmingly deserves to be respected. The Internet may have facilitated the exchange of information and ideas but the outspoken sentiment of the sixties and seventies is becoming daily more remote to many in contemporary times when almost any kind of civil service job is accompanied by a non disclosure agreement.

Whatever the reason and howsoever it came to be I have long claimed that the local force is seriously in error in its evaluation of me: more recently the negligence they have displayed in respect of thefts from within my squalid and unheatable slug ridden flat has only encouraged further acts of theft and vandalism which continue to severely hamstring my ability to function as a citizen in any way. Without going over the details again of what happened when they refused to acknowledge the allegation my father was murdered by a half-brother in the hospital, it is unfortunately the case that a teenage girl from the neighbourhood (Lorraine Thorpe) ended up getting convicted of murdering two other friendly acquaintances.

 

She lacked if not the will, perhaps the depth of intellect and experience necessary for performing the parental role being demanded of her, in that she was her father Desmond's eldest child, he was a crippled industrial injuries victim not some shiftless street drunk as the press has carelessly portrayed him. Saying that she unfortunately isn't going to be able to repay the $20 she owes me by walking the dog (or is it $45?) aptly betokens the remark that the dog was poisoned by another young lady from the hood on January 6th 2010, whose motivation for the heinous act seems to have been that I had angrily repudiated the script of my being a New Labour aficionado when I unwillingly arrived there late in 2002: there are some genuinely poor folks in the hood, and this latter female Kelly seems to have irritably assumed (anti-terrorist spiel?) that I must therefore be a hated Tory, whereas the truth is that I don't vote and bitterly regret having listened to those who embroiled me in conversation about the value of enfranchisement when I was myself about fifteen.

I have said before that I do not believe she sought her father's destruction in any sort of genuinely conscious sense as he was the only decent thing she had. He was (unsurprisingly given the enormity of the industrial injuries he had sustained) quite useless but he was decent and on the basis of what he had related to me I thought him a very likeable and decent human being: there are too few of them around. I haven't quite worked out how it was that she and Paul Clarke had battered Rosie Hunt to death but I am inclined to proffer that it was something to do with some kind of a discussion of sado-masochism which my paternal half-brother seems to have offered up as an excuse for beating my own father. She seems to have been convicted of his murder as an accessory because she hadn't quite found the temerity to repudiate and inform on the homicidal intentions of the large powerfully built fortysomething she had gotten mixed up with and I am quite sure her younger brother definitely did hold that against her. I am not quite certain that Paul Clarke is actually dead as I get the impression the prison suicide report might be a standard sort of spinspiel disseminated by the MOJ in contentious cases. If the force had ignored reports about sounds of violence coming from Rosie Hunt's address prior to the attack which killed her, then one tends to think it ought to put them in some further serious trouble, and it might account for strange discrepancies in accounts of these two killings, as well as further motivation for good old fashioned lying.

It might seem an odd point at which to refer to Germany and the Germans but the domestic press is oddly silent about proceedings toward the legalisation of cannabis in Germany. I suppose one of the salient relevant points is that if cannabis were legal in this country amongst other things we wouldn't be hearing so much about legitimately alcohol fuelled homicides. Germany has understandably acquired a fairly evil reputation since Kaiser Bill dragged his people into the Great War, and to my mind in this the Germans deserve to be warmly applauded for their courage and insight in going ahead with sensible and highly desirable if contentious legislation, as they do with their non nuclear policy which other nations would also do well to emulate. I have always been passionately anti nuclear and think it absurd that for example that voters have accepted glib assurances that the state will be able to guarantee to protect radioactive waste from terrorists for the next few thousand years or so: the stink emanating from Sellafield nuclear waste processing site has aroused concerned comments from other European nations recently. The new Sizewell C reactor has also been the subject of a lot of misleading intelligence as to its supposed benefits in that among other things the energy required to produce many tens of thousands of tons of concrete has not been factored into favourably portrayed calculations.

A local Judge (Martyn Levett?) recently bemoaned the amount of alcohol related domestic violence cases being brought before the courts in local newspapers; such a comment makes an interesting contrast with that made by one Justice Bryan about an horrific quadruple murder in Bermondsey in April of 2022. Max Stephens in a recent article for the Telegraph is soberly candid in his description of the event. One Joshua Jacques had stabbed to death his girlfriend, her mother, her grandmother and her grandmother's partner, in an orgy of violence which Justice Bryan alleged, in respect of the fact it seems the offender's consumption of cannabis had recently gone through the roof, that the bloodbath refuted the myth that cannabis is safe, without referring to the fact that the individual in question had a history of mental health problems, had also been consuming alcohol, and evidenced some religious obsession when confronted by policepersons. It is surely difficult for anyone to find words to describe such an appalling and in this country, quite unheard of sort of killing spree. I myself am really taken aback by the article in that the family seem oddly familiar, and it may be the case I have run across the late Mr Burke at some time somewhere or be vaguely acquainted with a relative of his: they seem charming enough if unsophisticated and it really beggars belief that such a thing could have happened to them.

A few observations might in contrast to Justice Bryan's tersely expressed opinion seem to back up the German Health Minister Karl Lauterbach's arguments for legalisation. This is in respect of the fact that the issue of a widely disregarded illegality leads to societal tensions and serious headaches that are not easily diagnosed as ensuing from legal considerations; I think many violent incidents for which cannabis is blamed rather reflect the fact of contradictory views about its use being subliminally forceful whilst it remains technically illegal leading to apparently inexplicable eruptions for which the drug itself is then blamed. My observations about the police force's attitude locally tends me to the conclusion they go out of their way to ignore it and have done so for many years; what is also of the fact that many families and especially inner urban communities have done so for generations. What is furthermore relevantly of the fact that the term cannabis is often misleadingly applied to various products of the hemp or marijuana plant, when it traditionally correctly refers to the solid refined product known as hashish, in contrast to marijuana the simple leaves and buds. Tony Blair commented some years ago that newly genetically engineered products were much stronger than in times past and for my money it was possibly this sort of super strength 'skunk weed' that may have played some role in these horrific murders. Among several key points having been propounded by the German Health Minister prior to the recent overwhelming legalisation vote in the Bundestag, was in respect of the importance of cutting off a huge revenue stream for organised crime, wherein financially motivated black marketeers are able to manufacture and distribute products that are simply too strong for casual consumption or contain hazardous adulterants. What is also of the remark that different varieties of marijuana plant products have different and opposite effects to others which many may not realise; some or most are generally pacific whereas others such as those distributed by Zulu medicine men to their warriors will induce elevated adrenaline levels.

In seeking to fashion some closing comment about the horrific murders of his girlfriend and her family by Mr Jacques, I have to say that I do get fed up with hearing about drink and drug use being proffered as an excuse for behaviour that is simply iniquitous, just as I get fed up with seeing endless expensively conducted parades of young people who seem to have mostly good social intents, being conducted into prisons for little good purpose because they have been experimenting with controlled substances, or have fallen into the lure of financial gain in an artificially created black market. It may be grasping at straws, and many will no doubt condemn me for saying so, but in seeking to find some or any sort of partial explanation for such motiveless looking murders, I am tempted to refer to comments I have made in recent years about the specious nature of a superficially well intentioned racial integrationist narrative commonly propounded by English speaking idealogues, in that as I have said, there is no easy remedy for the conflict scenarios inherent to the fact humanity has evolved into about a half dozen major ethnic groups some of whom are still living happily in stone age isolation whilst others cite their pseudo-democratic legality for an infectious destructive greed that is consuming the planet's congenial environments. Could part of some explanation for the inexplicable horror visited by this very strong looking man on his own, lie in feelings of worthlessness and contempt at perceptions of not being adequately, integrated? Could his espousal of Islam have been some kind of a concomitant reaction to European religious ideology and have played a role in the homicidal rage displayed toward his girlfriend and her family? Who dares to say?

I wish Chancellor Scholz and his coalition government all the best in their forthcoming struggles with unpopular crime and immigration issues and policies, and it is very much to be hoped they will provide an example of competent administration that the rest of Europe will find worthy: of course it helps if one has a real majority instead of a pretend majority like PM Sunak. For me the point of legalising cannabis is not specifically about drugs or drug use but rather the wider issue of the illusion of so called democratic governments having real control, as for example we all too often see they appear relatively powerless to impose reasonable and sensible restrictions on economic activity that is seriously degrading the environment. I very strongly feel that this example of accurately recognising the practical limits of what governments can achieve in directing social affairs is highly important and significant in many ways: not least because of such a destructive history of nationalistic warfare being perhaps the single most salient feature of living memory.

I'm tempted to think what's going on behind this one is something to do with the fact that the cops had led the EADT to publish the libel that I had beaten up two barmaids in 2010 (Nicholas Mudd has also been out queer bashing with the Chantry skins don't y'know): it is a plausible explanation for the trick question. These nice young ladies should really have objected to what is a loaded question presupposing that there is something different about cops who are also women, as opposed to cops who are also men. The first response could have amusingly been to the effect that they didn't know about any difference between themselves and male cops because they had never been a male cop. They get further lured into error in column four paragraph five in stating that whatever gender, being large and strong isn't relevant to the job, whereas the truth happens to be that it is an essential prerequisite for any frontline security role: how can you arrest criminals if you're simply not physically powerful enough to do it? Neither is Constable Groome's comment that "it's nice to be paired off with the lads," the most professional sort of observation one might think of. Surely the simple correct answer to the question is that it is exactly the same as being a male officer. I suppose I should concede the article was in the context of international women's day but it all seems a bit dated.

The first paragraph contains two isolated and unfathomable statements that have no meaning whatsoever: what's the, this, that perception?!??! What has it got to do with stigma? How could such a piece of gibberish relate to the appearance of the borough's streets? The girl's been smoking too much confiscated funny stuff! I want things too: especially things that are my own legal property! Among other things there's a silver cornet of my grandfather's been missing since late '84 that's now my own but I can't get a straight word from anywhere despite a fairly singular ongoing attempt to do so since the beginning of 1985.

As far as priorities mentioned in column two are concerned, with particular reference to the question of anti-social behaviour, she and her colleagues are as guilty as any I can think of offhand: this, with specific reference to the negligent, cynical and malicious manner in which the force has acted in my dealings with them over many years, taking apparent pleasure in continually adding injury to insult and multiplying the hurt and offence caused by criminal behaviour from which they seem to derive some perverse amusement. I have had to give up using my motorcycle because whenever it's parked outside it gets tampered with, so this year any sort of congenial Christmas arrangements went down the pan. An ageing uncle died last winter, and I'm afraid these people have absolutely no idea what kind of hostility their amateurish antics are eliciting! He and my aunt had all too arguably badly needed to have me around whilst trying to cope with their decline and instead, I was having to sit shotgun over my property whilst engaging in an endless time consuming and entirely fruitless ongoing attempt to get cops to even acknowledge reports that my flat was being habitually looted. I furthermore do not find their assertion that none of the neighbours has noticed unsupervised and surreptitious entries during the latter part of 2021 at all credible; associates of the landlord have clearly taken a great deal of trouble to sneak in and rifle through my belongings in quite some detail on a number of occasions but approaching a dozen households have a clear view of the only door.

As regards column three, if the Inspector has been spending much time investigating her colleagues, she is not yet succeeding in seeking to make sure they have been doing their jobs properly: as far as I know this is an absolute fact. As for personability I don't see what that's got to do with policework and surely most would think it more relevant to advertising or public relations. Saying that we do work hard is what is known as an unsubstantiated allegation. I do not doubt she wants people to trust herself and her colleagues but this sort of witless drivelling is not likely to engender trust or confidence: quite the contrary! What is of making the tentative observation that she doesn't seem to be entirely on the wrong side of me whereas her (erstwhile?) Inspectress colleague Ms Powell who presided over the misbegotten prosecution of my good self in 2010 certainly is until she supervises its revocation: I really hate that kind of dumb down white trash I really do, and ah ain't kiddin yuh.

As regards the final paragraph in column three which continues into column four: again, what is this? How does this feed into work with press and politicians? More nonsensical gibberish! For the middle paragraph in column four where she talks about rapidly changing roles for her colleagues I read it as moving people around so as no-one can ever be held responsible for anything: evasion of responsibility! Just as with the recent succession of paper tiger prime ministers. As for the rest of it well, I have no idea what sense of stability she is talking about and if anyone does I would like to hear about it: she should have explained what that sense is according to herself. As for the final paragraph, wanting to be an 'open leader' is a bit of a weird philosophical notion in that e.g. one logically can't help wondering what a closed leader might happen to be, and in the second sentence she again mentions (that connection) something she hasn't specified: what connection exactly? Presumably she is referring to a hypothetical connection between police and public in some respect, but she makes no qualifying definition of what she means without which the statement is meaningless.

25 01 24

Saddened to hear of the death of Tom Wilkinson who will be remembered for some genuinely great one liners like the scene from "The Patriot" in which he declares his of his new General's uniform that "very well, it's a nice horse blanket," which I thought a very British joke and have often wondered if non native English speakers found it as absurdly funny as I did.

I am still continually finding unauthorised deletions and tampering with uploads onto this site and have to repeat I really don't know how or why. Another comment that has been hacked and deleted this year referred to the sort of penalties that policepersons should face if they lie and conceal evidence, I feel this should be expanded to include lawyers and CPS employees: these sort of illegal deletions might seem to point at rogue cops and local government weirdos. I like working with the original html codes as they were something the layman could comprehensibly hobby around with. I suppose I am going to have to learn to use an up to date html writer at some point but as with much constantly updated Infotech I find it very disconcerting: I like being able to understand the codes themselves which is not possible with more complex contemporary software which spits out zillions of incomprehensible characters.

This story about how one dirty cop Derek Ridgewell ruined numerous lives from the '70s has been floating about in the dailies for a few years now.

If Simon Hattenstone's lengthy dissertation for the Guardian on January 25th reads like a real modern horror story it's because that's exactly what it is!

08 02 24

The case of 'the spy in the bag,' an MI6 Cryptographer found strangely deceased in 2010 continues to raise eyebrows in the press and is very concerning in particular respect of Macrocybercrime stories like the recent attack on the British Library which is perhaps the institution most central to British public life. I think that the powers that be or the political establishment for want of a better phrase, has done much to seek to smother this sort of story written for the Guardian by Lamorna Ash on February 25th in not wanting to undermine a certain amount of all too arguable overconfidence in the digital systems that now manage so many aspects of our lives.

The story tends to go with this one by James Cockayne for the Guardian about Asian slave hackers from November 23rd last year: the relevant issues will probably be more familiar to more casual sorts of Internet users who find that they are going to have to learn to use their computers for banking and shopping whether they like it or not, and further tends to support the contention that computerisation of governments' administrations is not as wholesome as has been propounded.

This story about the death of Cryptographer Gareth Williams by Louis Regan on February fifth for The Sun contradicts many others such as Chris Kitching's Mirror article on Feb 7th 2021 and Martin Robinson's for the Mail on Feb 6th this year. Suffice it to say that the business is very deeply concerning for anyone wanting to have confidence in the nation's evolving institutions. Many older readers may in attempting to assess the ramifications of such a security debacle, uncomfortably recall that the Soviet Agent Kim Philby was on the point of becoming the MI6 boss just prior to being unmasked in the mid 1950's, and therefore of the observation that the Russians are capable of that degree of penetration of British Security Services. What is relevantly that among those facts about the Williams case not open to question is that he was working on Russian money laundering though quite as to whether that constitutes sufficient motive for the assassination of "a relatively low level cryptographer," might seem open to some question. I do have a lot of trouble believing that his arguably unconventional sexual/personal life was a motive for murder in that if he was murdered as his family believe, it was carried out with a high degree of professionalism that one wouldn't tend to associate with a disgruntled partner or blackmailer or anything such.

17 02 24

I daresay many besides myself are saddened to hear of the murder of Alexei Navalny, and for reasons which are not entirely altruistic in that there is far too much careless rhetoric about war being circulated by armchair patriots: this with particular reference to nuclear armed powers like Russia and Israel. I have said many times since war in the Ukraine blew up that no-one can defeat the Russians except the Russians and I believe the same rationalisation holds generally true of states maintaining various weapons of mass destruction. Whilst on the one hand as far as Mr Putin is concerned I am glad to hear that someone interprets the arguably quite imperceptible influence of the Nazi diaspora as very real and very malign, on the other it is thoroughly tedious and profoundly upsetting to hear of endless murders of almost anyone voicing serious threats to his hegemony over the Russian state. That is to say nothing of such atrocities as the debacle at Beslan when he predictably seized the opportunity to advertise his personal authority by launching an assault on Islamist separatist (terrorists?) with the also predictable (and possibly easily avoidable) consequence of hundreds of dead civilians including many dozens of dead children.

Quite frankly I had thought after one assassination attempt Mr Navalny's return to his homeland in 2021 the act of a suicidal madman: no-one should have expected or asked it of him. He will be remembered by history as a true Russian hero, a real gentleman, and a man possessed of insane courage. The remark really betokens some detailed analytical comment about the international political dynamics which lead to the eastward retreat of Soviet/Russian/Communist influence by thousands of miles in recent decades. What is of the remark that western and English speaking powers are not free from sin and that they are perhaps rather more easily able to buy their way out of bad publicity. It may seem vague but the assassination of Grigory Rasputin by British agents trying to keep German troops engaged with Russia still lies within living memory, as does the seizure of much native American land by greedy iniquitous Europeans as recently as the 1930s.

It is of course not the easiest of matters for westerners constantly saturated with social and political propaganda about democracy and law, to discern what the simple relevant truth may be about Russia's internal condition, that is if any sort of meaningful truth in such matters can ever be reasonably and acceptably simplified since e.g. the Beslan hostage takers had summarily executed about twenty people immediately. The best salient sort of explanation seems to be that following the collapse of the Soviet Union, that western powers headed by the US, sought to inflict a 'propre' sort of capitalist condition on those remaining within the post Soviet/Russian sphere of influence, and that Putin as a sort of mid-level FSB operative had set out to restrain the evolving oligarchy within a populist, nationalist and traditionalist ethos, it being the case that those sorts of values had obviously been neglected during the Soviet era. What is of recalling that in the Gorbachev/Yeltsin era the west had interpreted a new liberal democratic Russia cast in its own image; Putin is perhaps more than anything else a re-assertion of a sort of tradition of government by the security service. I am tempted to suggest for what it is worth that Navalny's mistake was to think of phrasing a real challenge to that sort of institutionalised fact of life in Russia.

22 02 24

I am continuing to experience dysfunctional symptoms of hacking and this time it is manifest as something other than simple deletions. At the moment it is as much as I can do to keep some sort of effective track of this page and its predecessor and I don't really have the space to work effectively or conduct a meaningful technical investigation: that would take about a month of undivided attention and significant expenditure. During the earlier part of last year I had taken a significant amount of trouble to spell out my problems/difficulties with the force to the Police Commissioner, it having been perhaps relevantly the case that a remark he had made in the East Anglian looked perhaps meaningfully similar to an essay question I had been working on with the Open University, and it being a matter of analytical interest to anyone associated with the town as to why a cheerful, civilised and quite prosperous looking if small c conservative county town, has acquired more of the character of a seedy New York borough over a few decades. Since I had taken a fair bit of trouble over it and had been quite pleased with the result as a piece of work/analysis from not just my own interest/perspective, I was utterly furious to find when I checked the document some weeks later that it had been corrupted. The point is to say that some of it seems to have turned up in unauthorised and anonymous tamperings/revisions to one of my recent weblogs. As I say it's as much as I can do to ensure that the last two logs are serving my short term practical purposes in that I am seeking to persuade a potential new landlord to overlook a formal resolution of my problems with the present, in which respect I cannot afford the manifestation of incompetent looking errors.

Mathew Weaver's story for the Guardian on Feb 19th this year about another recent death of a patient of the Norfolk and Suffolk Health Trust is perhaps unsurprising given that is but one among some thousands of premature deaths of patients that have occurred among the Trust's patients in recent years, but what really grabbed my attention was the rather mild language used by the Coroner in describing that the Trust has simply been falsifying its records: this might explain a great deal.

This story from 2019 credited to the Press Association but published by the Guardian also from my hometown is eerily consonant in perhaps several ways with my own, not least in respect of the fact of the reference to the fact that the A&E mental health team mistook a homicidal and suicidal man for a case of some kind of weird penis envy, it being perhaps relevantly the case that when I was accused of burgling my own so called home in 1985 I got the impression that the court was seeking to admonish an inappropriate and unidentified set of (male) genitalia. I have long complained that the Trust doesn't seem able to comprehend that it/they might have spooned up false information (people do in fact try to put it about) or capable of interpreting accurate information correctly. It happened about the same time as I was arrested by dirty cops who had said they wanted to discuss the antisocial behaviour of Community Law Centre staff, and then had me arrested and sectioned without explanation by mental health people whom I reckoned were obviously nuts themselves, so they're not that short of resources to provide that sort of attention for those that do want it. This kind of behaviour was what I originally wanted to talk to a Community Centre Lawyer about but they had proved petulant, racist, deceitful, and have made a disgusting self indulgent travesty out of money that was supposed to be spent in the public interest and was no doubt very hard to come by. It is an irresistible notion that if it was a dark skinned person who had come in they would never have made any demur about what was really an appalling amateurish and questionably motivated error of their own: it is also certainly a fact they will now have less credibility in dealing with any real racism.

25 02 24

The plot continues to thicken as far as my Internet usage is concerned: having sought to record some few days ago that a significant part of an elaborate missive on various matters relating to the history of the borough in various respects to the Police Commissioner had unaccountably disappeared last year and reappeared on a somehow corrupted webpage recently, I find that the section has disappeared again. Not the least of the matters referred to was obviously the fact of the disastrous impact the unpredictable behaviour of local police has had on my wellbeing. Such strange phenomena obviously do not improve matters either and one cannot help but wonder what this might portend in that it seems a reasonable presumption that the matter of the site must be of some kind of specific interest to someone: a mere saboteur would surely not have taken the trouble to perform such strange pranks. One friend of mine who is well qualified to know about such matters seems to have suggested that out of date and erroneous coding might be to blame; this however does not explain the fact of missing sections of word documents or the fact of quantities of items having entirely vanished from my computer's desktop in recent years.

Here's a rather ghoulish story about a schoolgirl who trusted police and public services by Mathew Lodge and Rory Tingle for the Mail on Jan 16th 2024: she wound up dead at the age of thirteen!

28 02 24

Spent half of last week trying to work out why I couldn't find comments I was sure I had recorded in recent weblogs. I checked and rechecked maybe a dozen times, only to find that this morning they had re-appeared; this was the case not only with the online display but with the pre-uploaded blueprint versions, which is really, really freaky.

06 03 24

Having gotten through a university access course by last summer via distance learning it became apparent I was making simple mistakes that I ought not to have made given the time I spent studying English and History when I was in my twenties and thirties. What is inescapably of considering this might add some further substantiation to the significant suspicion that my paternal family's fortunes had been the focus of some interest from on high within the political nation as the country resigned itself to another world war some 65 years ago and that to a certain extent this has continued to influence the course of my own life. I really should point out that I never wanted to think about this and that I have enough real and immediate practical problems without having to consider sensational historical theories about them. That I managed to get something like at least an average sort of pass mark despite very hostile personal circumstances was quite a significant miracle in itself, but the fact I was highly surprised at simple grammatical errors which were mostly to do with my overcapitalising, might for example, conceivably tend to suggest that teachers had spent more time thinking of devising scripts flattering to the monarchy than they had actually trying to relate any useful language skills: it is something my father should have corrected and certainly seems to substantiate a manipulative scheming on his part.

I have of course unwillingly theorised about this latter fact from various perspectives since my father tacitly pointed toward such an explanatory hypothesis about the monarchy in his last years. Recent weblogs have also mentioned one or two English teachers of some minor distinction I had encountered in latter schooldays and at College. I can recall a senior college lecturer Bob Dumper had made some comment about capitalisation in the very early eighties, this was to the effect that it should sometimes be considered a matter of style and presentation rather than of prescriptivist ruling, especially when setting out headings. I was quite furious to think that after all the conscientious trouble I have gone to over the years to try and make sure I was writing correctly, that I was in fact making errors that arguably ought not to be expected of a better quality fifteen year old GCSE student. The matter of differentiating between common and proper nouns is not so simple as a lot of legitimate authorities tend to suggest, in that when one refers to someone as a specific person as in my father, my sister etc, as part of a noun phrase, a common noun does in fact have the quality or characteristics of a proper noun which is usually defined as the name of a person place or thing: what is for example of critically noting that love is a thing, but it is never capitalised except at the beginning of a sentence or in a heading.

It is a real shame that domestically things haven't resolved themselves well enough for me to have been willing to immediately proceed onto a more ambitious programme of undergraduate studies. I had made enough catastrophic errors in interpreting the Open University interface to have warranted considerable circumspection even if I had not the personal and domestic problems I have, and even the lesser options for the first year of a degree course involves some £6000 of student debt. I had almost obtained a distinction grade for a summary of Wilfred Owen's war poetry and probably would have if I'd have been more 'au fait' with the IT. Studying his disjointed but most elegant and insightful feelings about the nationalist horror he and so many others of his generation had become embroiled in brought some crumbs of comfort to appalled and doomed feelings about my own wasted life: the best of people it seems have willingly engaged in even greater folly than I myself though it seems hard to comprehend.

24 03 24

John Harris's recent Guardian article shines a spotlight on some of the extraordinary publicity that the Trust's patient death record is generating.

Among other things it seems Ms Donovan is the 9th Trust CEO in ten years: many of the comments such as her asseveration of determination to create widescale change are all too arguably quite meaningless. What exactly does widescale mean in this context? Change from exactly what to exactly what? I have said before that I do think a sort of ideological polarisation between urban dwellers with typically progressivist and nominally left wing local government representatives advocating a sort of 'New Jerusalem' public service micromanagement of peoples' lives and an influential conservative legal and financial establishment with very contrary views about what citizens should or should not be, is to blame for many becoming desperate and suicidal. Another rather striking suicide case from last November was that of a good looking and attractive 24 year old female paramedic who looked as if she had everything to live for: such an example is hard to believe and it really makes one wonder what is going on. It tends to cross the mind that she may have taken a seriously ill humour of one sort or another as the result of encountering the hostility of the better off rural bourgeoisie who can be quite good at blaming mental health issue statistics and others on the sick for their inability to economically compete with young Americans. I suppose it is a rather tasteless sort of wry aside to suggest that she may have glanced through my website and noticed the state of the bathroom I have been having to use for the last 14 years but to some extent it seems unfortunately harmonious with my ongoing legal/accommodation issues.

There are quite a few articles in the dailies about her case but e.g. I cannot link to The Times without a subscription. Charlie Jones's article for BBC News seems to cover most of the main points in her story. I suppose I would tend to reiterate that in respect of Bipolar Disorder that mood swings are part of a normal healthy functioning mind and that there is too much self justifying pseudo science being applied to the issue of mental health in many respects though this young lady seems to have been having real trouble coping with them once she had moved to Suffolk: there are some really strange circumstances attending her efforts to get help from professionals and at one point they threatened to call police.

As far as the ideological context of these matters is concerned what is obviously of the remark that much of the more intelligent, enlightened, and influential politically progressive, had invested far too much and for far too long in the European dream. The post Brexit political landscape is littered with unanswered questions, moral dilemmas, unresolved paradoxes and simple downright lies. For my part I would like to see more focus on those Brexiteers who have consistently if not directly propounded that there is some kind of national community within which people have some sense of duty and fellowship toward one another: that is not at all manifest in viewing other citizens as mere statistics to be economically exploited.

08 04 24

It is some indication of the chaos and dysfunction attending my more recent past that I have only just today returned the last of my father's oxygen bottles to his service provider some fifteen years after he died. In describing the circumstances I would seek to reiterate that the Hospice and Care Home staff behaved very badly and seemed to be labouring under various misapprehensions. I got nothing of any real value from his estate despite all the indications that he was trying to frame a meaningful apology to me in respect of allegations he made in 2002 rather than trying to make life easy for his younger son who basically got all the money whilst police were failing to act or even acknowledge reports about the manner of his death. I was left to clean all the junk and pick up the pieces of his household without practical assistance from any of his other relatives; in trying to assess what is best to say and do about various matters I still have not as I say quite gone through all his papers and belongings.

I have sought to relate the particulars meaningfully to various parties over the years but it seems apt to restate that subsequent to his obsequies having been undertaken, I had not planned to remain on the sick which I had originally asked for because I was moving in with him to act as his 'de facto' carer. My version of events is that he was apologetically trying to leave me just about enough money to make something of a fresh start in life. He had during his last few months tacitly framed some comprehensible explanation for his actions in acting out delusions and making false accusations which among other things involved quite a complex dissertation on his parents' marriage and the social and political background to it. What was disastrously of the fact that police seem to have gotten hold of the cover story that he had previously fed to care staff in his more recent care home, rather than acting on the directions of the ER staff who called police because of my paternal half-brother's homicidal behaviour. Without appropriate actions on their part he ended up with the money and I ended up with a fresh load of trouble which did not allow for the fresh start on a serious career perspective which I badly needed and which my father had above all things owed me.

My previous weblogs seem to be still plagued by various anonymous and unauthorised tamperings.

Sometime within the last year or two I noticed that the document which is headed, A Perspective on Legal Problems & a Site History Statement had unaccountably had one of its images go missing (sadness.jpg) that is to say the code was there but the image it referred to was not. According to my latest computer I replaced the image and emended the document on February 11th this year. Having started to go through some of the logs I find that the code for a picture of my palm scar which has been variously referred to since 2004 had gone missing.It wasn't a very good picture in that it didn't show very well what kind of a deeply ingrained childhood scar it is, but the question obviously arises as to what motive could there be for removing it? The mind boggles it really does! Anyone having the power to do such a thing could easily destroy the whole site and delete everything on my computer; it really is a hugely interesting question as to what might lie behind these various niggling little emendations.

Here is a copy of the same document including scar picture from an old computer record which says it was last modified on April 12th 2022. I am not suggesting that anyone should necessarily read it as I firstly don't know what else might be missing from document I originally uploaded. The current version linked from the homepage is probably now a better piece of prose but anyway there it is for reference. If you should happen to be among those who may have read either, its purpose was besides reconstructing events, to try and get it over how much work I have put into trying to write up various serious social and legal matters over many years and of the extent to which I have not been correctly understood when I should have. Recent controversy over the Norfolk and Suffolk Health Trust seems to bear out my consistent allegation that I have not been in serious error, and that people are more out of their depth than they like to think. Those individuals who carted off my friend Christopher Schonbeck to his death some fifteen years ago now, were all how you say, non ethnic health workers, and I do not think its racist to suggest that they are having more trouble than they like to think in appraising matters of a cultural and psychological nature, since the same thing is true of anyone having any sort of immediate historical derivation from outside of the UK.

14 04 24

Went to attend an open day at the local University yesterday and it brought back floods of painful reminiscences about my wasted life which made a strange sort of contrast with some pleasure at enjoying educated company for the first time in many years. It is now over thirty years since one John Norman made false allegations about my threatening staff at the old Suffolk College. The fact was that in looking round at the various nooks and crannies of the old college campus I was almost imagining I could see Reggie Kray's face staring at me out of various corners. Much as it definitely does not now in most sort of respects do me any good to theorise about my 'discovered memories' in 2004 of some sort of encounter with him and Ronnie all those years gone by, a clearer picture of what happened is still slowly and painfully emerging. The fact I spent much of my younger years fatuously faffing around at the then Suffolk College enduring various compliments about how intelligent I was without being able to write anything seems in retrospect very much a symptom of their presence and influence. I would rather hear some comment about this from some kind of respectable or responsible source than get carried away with thinking about it and such thoughts only really tend of course to elicit questions about the nature of responsibility and respectability.

When in 2004 I first realised that a nasty little scar on my right palm I could never recall having acquired since I first noticed it in 1970, seemed to go with memories of meeting 'the twins' at what seems some point over the winter of 66-7, it was one morning in 2004 when I awoke from what seemed an unpleasant dream only to slowly realise I was recalling real events and the immediate dysfunctional conclusion was that it went with some kind of cocaine intrigue: that in itself is straightforward enough and equally unsurprising is the fact no-one talked about it. Whatever had actually happened, once my mother remarried in 1974 pretty much anyone who knew the facts had acquired powerful motives for insisting the matter be forgotten with little serious aforethought about what was happening to my poor little brain. Several people who must have known the precise details have obviously since then passed away and of those actually present only my mother remains alive. At first I thought it must have been inflicted by my mother in a cocaine addicted rage but after two decades of consistent musing over the ins and outs, and especially after wandering round the college grounds where I spent a very great deal of time between the ages of 17 and 29 and irritably thinking of how fruitlessly I spent those years trying to pass handwritten A level exams, I am rather now tending to the conclusion it was inflicted by Reggie Kray in seeking to impart some kind of message about this sort of black marketeering. One tends to think there must have been a sort of implicit personal social and political blackmail involved and I suppose it could have been any of several different individuals that actually gave me the scar. Many of course from the highest to the lowest in the land were seen to be embarrassed by their real, imagined or assumed connections to the twins and accurate interpretations seems to depend on a proper assessment of the virtually unparalleled nature of the post war cultural revolution at its height. What is of the remark that very few are willing to make a serious objective honest or meaningful comment about what the cultural revolution was in social terms, in that our daily lives are rather preoccupied with short termist economic rhetoric which facilitates the functioning of western economies.

Quite a few little stories are immediately threatening to unravel to my practical distress and they are most associated with accommodation, work and social security issues: these are bedevilled by my becoming a target for petty crime apparently because I'm not fitting in with some script about my being a left wing social progressive. What is arguably of the fact that the town's mayoress has been grimacing unpleasantly in a succession of local newspaper photos at rumours that activists were trying to find out about some familial connection to the Krays when I thought they were going to oversee my being housed at age 17. Late last year I thought I had an offer of more suitable and legally managed accommodation for mid February but it has to my immense distress fallen through which leaves me in more significant trouble. I have had the devil of a trouble trying to hold on to my belongings in more recent years. Most of them could be put into storage but I desperately need the offer of some kind of trouble free accommodation that would allow me to pursue undergraduate studies in the near future. What is very much of suggesting that this is what I am best suited to do and that it is what I really need to do before I become too completely absurdly aged for it to be meaningful.

16 04 24

As far as facts and events go my father had always seemed to think in terms of manipulating perhaps not so much literally secrets according to a sort of middle class set of norms and values, but perhaps what might reasonably be termed unknown facts, and I would have said he had experienced a lot of trouble reconciling this with the dreadful fact of the Holocaust occurring parallel to his childhood. The point in many ways is to consider that I have never really been part of this sort of respectable world of solicitors and middle class values; for me this has always been a ridiculous sort of social propaganda fable like something from an Enid Blyton children's book. The mining community in which as the summer of '69 waned I first found myself going to school with nothing but vague recollections of having been looked after by grandparents I would tragically see little more of before they died, was not quite a nightmarish inner city scenario in that it seemed to have a relatively wholesome sense of community in many ways, but it was quite racked by poverty, especially during the miner's strikes that brought down the Heath administration in 1974. What is among other things of seeking to clarify that poverty is not just about money it takes many forms: there are many financially wealthy householder's in England's shires living bored and socially unwholesome existences who envy the sort of easy going social familiarity of such communities as Lynemouth Northumberland was in 1970. It is similarly the case that for example New Yorkers may have a lot of money in their pockets but in many ways they feel themselves poor compared to native south-americans who have idyllic forests to wander around in and no money at all.

The point here for me personally is not so much psychological but generally social, political and economic in a personal and individual sense. Among other things it is ridiculous that I cannot obtain any legal advice in respect of the fact it has been alleged in recent years that I knocked some pub landlady's teeth out or anything else, such as my housing and my own precise diagnosis for being on the sick long term etc etc and so on and so forth: this is especially the case whilst so many are fannying on about the rule of law. We do live in a society where information is very key to what happens on a daily basis and people have made significant small fortunes from books about social and political events into which I am increasingly finding detailed insights. What is obviously of the remark I cannot help wondering if a newspaper editor or public figure might be interested enough to pay cash for some of this interesting and quite informed speculation.

Nobody I am immediately acquainted with wants to talk about it but for twenty years now I have as I have oft repeated been finding memories of an unfortunate encounter with the Krays during early infancy which seem associated with a palm scar of unknown origin. Much as I want to focus on practical problems instead of indulging in sensational speculation there seems every reason to believe I had my palm slashed in some incident which was significantly appraised by key figures in the national political establishment or something such, and that it may be reasonably associated with such facts as that Harold Wilson soon thereafter failed to attain re-election significantly because of bad publicity about London's gangster culture being a blight on more desirable aspects of the cultural revolution then underway. What is generally of the remark that for the first time in history the mass of the population had seen the truth about leaders and government bubbling unerringly into view. As far as the morality of everyday self righteous nation state elites proselytising about democracy goes, Germany had lost Prussia, Britain had lost southern Ireland, the US was embroiled in Vietnam and many rhetorical explanations of deserving had been exposed as lacking in an essential element of objective truth.

This is something I have significantly sought to air for quite some time but what has not been explicitly stated, is that painful key events in my personal history, especially those which relate to the separation of my natural parents, seem to occur precisely parallel to the eruption of the contemporary Irish troubles from the late sixties. There is no doubt that when my father decamped from his home turf to a library job in a Northumbrian town in August 1969, it was almost the same day as Home Secretary James Callaghan deployed soldiers onto the streets of Belfast. Neither is there any doubt that his departure was largely occasioned by Bernadette an older sister of my mother of whom I also realised about twenty years ago that she had certainly been pursuing him with lurid accusations prior to his departing. The suggestion seems to arise that it may have significantly been a reality that she had personally been seen to have upset an applecart of political stability at a time when conservative forces were very much on the back foot. It is quite a complex observation or supposition entailing some detailed recapitulation, that her presence may have thus been in some kind of meaningful manner, a catalyst for the loyalist reaction to ebullient civil rights progressivism in Ulster. The key question in evaluating such an hypothesis might seem to be as to what her role was in this presumed sort of scene involving the Krays in 66-7; this in relation to some presumption that it was informally known my paternal family had been a focus for the successful resistance to appeasement a generation beforehand. It is far from completely implausible that a working class Irish girl from a Catholic orphanage managing to wreak havoc on society's attempts to deal with the chaotic anarchy of those times right at the heart of the political nation could have literally been the spark which ignited 'the troubles' across the water. The violence of those troubles may have largely ebbed away for the present, but there are all sort of enquiries and legal situations relevantly ongoing and they are far from resolved in their political repercussions: what is of asserting that there are many legitimately interested and sufficiently well informed to comment accurately and meaningfully on this particular question so I do not need to do so myself.

What might seem to be relevantly of the remark that the solicitor Smythe might have picked out this odd looking parallel if he had not have been so preoccupied with reactionary social and political notions in 1985. What is after all of the interesting observation that my consistent argument that he violently shouted down my attempt to phrase a sensible series of comments and observations about my personal social and legal situation occurred at a time when all the major bombing convictions from the IRA campaigns of the seventies were in the process of being recanted by the domestic political establishment. This does tend to emphasise the argument that I had been badly misappraised by a clearly fallible legal establishment and tends to pose the question as to whether my own personal 'headache' might reasonably be thought of as related to the Troubles: of course I daresay that many could more obviously argue the same thing and I have often thought that apparently unconnected acts of violence on the British mainland might be partly consequential of their enforced ignorance across the water. The recent case of a triple murder perpetrated by an African gentleman in Nottingham has elicited howls of outrage from the families of completely innocent and uninvolved bystanders because a medical diagnosis sent him to hospital instead of a prison. He is known to have been raving on about being spied on by MI5 and so on rather than having some kind of religious obsession, which is arguably only at all explicable in the light of Troubles enquiries in that it is only in relatively recent years that many particularities of the doings of police and military intelligence have come to much light.

A recent channel 4 documentary series was much more candid than much of what we have seen and heard and in some ways I tend to think of the conflict as sociological rather than ideological, in that poor terraced housing communities with loose fitting windows and outside lavatories do not often need much of an excuse to start throwing bricks and venting their feelings about justice and the economy on security services. On the other hand, whilst events in Ukraine and the middle-east have rather overtaken Brexit blues for the newspaper columnists, there is a very interesting symbolic debate going on in Ireland which tends to pit the valid notion of a single real political authority in the British Isles against very up to date notions of real proportionally representative democracy within a federal Europe. Like most I did not vote on the Brexit referendum, thought either question was daft, too hastily arranged, and that either answer would basically leave me at the continued cynical mercy of the same rapacious bunch of lawyers, but in theory I have a certain amount to gain from its outcome in that I am not a flag waving patriot or anything quite like that, but as I have mentioned before, aside from being a born Englishman with in effect only southern Irish relatives, I have little particular interest in the affairs of continental Europe beyond accurately describing the Holocaust and the ensuing Cultural Revolution of which the Irish Troubles were but a small part, and feel that perhaps some re-assertion of British identity/interests might for me personally be a better idea than many: I am obviously much more interested in legal reform in terms of trying somehow to bring the solicitors who have ruined my life chances to book than I am in matters relating to the constitution.

22 04 24

The truth is as they say stranger than any fiction: the original dynamic for much of these events is arguably the accession of Queen Victoria in 1837 and in the assertion the cousin she married was in fact a half-jewish illegitimate. This arguably sets the scene for WW2 and the Holocaust as well as perhaps defining in the original historical perspective, that one race would not decide or be able to wipe out the others leaving humanity facing an arguably hybrid future: at least for as long as the environment holds out against nominal, supposed, rhetorically respectable government and constantly expanding numbers. This generally in respect of such facts as that Churchill was of significantly Cherokee Indian descent and that Hitler himself very much seems to have been a partly Jewish individual who had the fact laundered from his official personal history and then became something rather more than a symbol of reaction to miscegeny.

Of course I didn't realise that I myself am partly descended from a Jewish immigrant, whom it seems on considered reflection might be considered as something like a camp follower of Prince Albert's, until the mid nineties. If it is accepted that my father had become not just an informal focus for the anti appeasement faction in his childhood, which many individuals of course were but perhaps rather something more like the principal focus for anti appeasement, it might seem to explain much including that I have arguably had some strange attention (worthless spoiled Aristos evading their indebtedness and responsibility?) from war veterans over the years. Facts that tend to support the hypothesis include that his paternal grandmother was related to Nelson's affinity and arguably had many influential friends at the Admiralty whom were prior to the Abdication likely smarting at the thought of having to declare her children an illegal breed or something like that: as does the deepening suspicion he was related to the late Dame Vera Lynn. This hypothetical perspective might generally explain why my own life has taken so many strange dystopian twists and turns and why so many clever people with so many clever stories have gotten so much about me so horribly wide of the mark. What is for example of the remark that the solicitor Smythe who should have resolved my strange situation in 1985 mistook embarrassment for shame and a struggling to remember for a struggling to forget.

If it is furthermore taken that the fact of Victoria's consort Prince Albert's parentage had become an open rather than closed secret as WW2 raged on then the facts about what happened to me in the late sixties as a toddler might be explicable in terms of something like a meaningful reality being that the royals felt indebted to my father as a relative nobody, and for example perhaps that Princess Margaret had told Reggie Kray to drop some of his sought after cocaine stash into my father's lap, or perhaps rather that of his young fancy piece my mother. The notion entails quite a lot of thinking about the way the human mind works and the way post war society functioned, in that it extrapolates that the late Princess may have been irritated for it to have been appraised by an audience of socialites and war veterans, that a child who had been such a focus, was being seen to be cruelly exploited by Reggie Kray. As far as I know it is certainly true that insider social commentators consider it a fact that also at roughly around the year 1969-70 she was ordered by the late Queen to take her little party bandwagon out of London and off to some Caribbean island.

All this sounds rather far fetched I know but I can only reiterate that the truth is stranger than fiction, and if something like this story is the meaningful truth, that if I had been ever been permitted as it were to remember that an unfortunate key point in my history involved the Krays, that the rest of it would have likely unravelled which could perhaps have done funny things to the late Queen's voice. What is I suppose of the fact that for various reasons no-one was ever going to relate such an extraordinary explanation for my sordid childhood and the sinister misfortune which has attended my attempts to compose an adult existence. Things could so easily have turned out much better for me with the most strange and unusual misunderstandings consistently having cropped up for no obvious reason at every twist and turn. What is very much of reiterating that one supposes this always had to have the most extraordinary and sensational explanation way beyond some kind of malfunctioning public service theory. What is in surveying my increasingly aged appearance of bitterly surmising that various teachers, medics and lawyers and other public servants might have been variously thinking they had perceived or deduced some kind of approved political script: that unfortunately for me glossed over the question of any problematic familial history. What is much less open to question is that from my mid to late teens I thought labour party aficionados were going to see that I was housed in my own right and instead I found myself cast in the role of a soft on the monarchy new labour cheerleader rabble rouser.

Reggie Kray was known to have been a labour supporter and it may again be something like the meaningful truth that a key element in his downfall as a social figure was in allowing my mother's older sister to have stirred up some kind of notable chaos. Bernadette collapsed of a heart attack in 2006 having literally just received a compensatory windfall from the government of the Irish Republic in respect of her savage upbringing in a Catholic orphanage. A significant five figure sum had been in her bank for about three days prior to this fatal collapse and she had spent little of it; whatever else may or may not have been true about her role in these affairs and my own personal history this was remarkably bad luck from her point of view. What is of the remark that the Republic is rather embarrassed at the mental state of many of those who have been gifted such care as the Magdalen Homes provided in that it rather detracts from its historical and institutional legitimacy: many of their relatives have also been affected so it is interestingly the case that to some extent it seeks to apologise for what has happened to me. I am very interested to try and substantiate that my father had fled from maternal family intrigues in August of 1969 at the same time as troops appeared in Belfast, that I had been savaged and attacked with a razor blade at some point in prior infancy, that my father taught me to forget about it, that it had a number of interesting psychological repercussions in which I ought to be cast rather as a victim than an offender, that I have been misjudged because I have not been able to discern how various voices from among my maternal affinity have seemed familiar: there are various appertaining circumstances in which I feel that I have been let down by public servants and public services which are generally ensuing from a failure to even acknowledge my father's failure to explain various almost undiscernable but debilitating headaches attending my existence at around school leaving age.

06 05 24

In respect of my immediate situation with what many might call a sort of rogue landlord and the fact it seems likely to lead to some kind of a standoff within hours rather than days, what is of reiterating that I've taken considerable trouble over the last thirty months to try and get some acknowledgement from the local police force of the fact that someone who must have had keys has stolen a considerable quantity of personal possessions from within the flat where I have been existing for the last fourteen years or so.

It was not obvious until late in 2021 and many of the relevant facts are extremely hard to believe; I still cannot quite comprehend that police will not even comment. Besides the theft of many personal goods like books, clothes, tools, even underwear, a large quantity of personal documents and letters went missing, one plug in computer drive was broken and a computer clearly tampered with as a number of files were missing: I would say this had occurred over quite a number of visits. The original context is in general that there is no practical, actual or realistic way of compelling landlords to legally maintain let properties without having significant four figure sums to spend on lawyers but that is now almost a minor contextual detail compared to the horrific train of relevant associated events that have ensued from 2010 in respect of this particular landlord/letting agent. In respect of the fact that I cannot get any sense at all out of the Criminal Cases Review Commission and that they seem to have acquired some ludicrous fictional account of a misbegotten prosecution for an assault I never perpetrated, what is I suppose of the fact it must have occurred to many that the evolution of the first of perhaps now several water accidents occurred soon after the local cops gave the landlady of the SpreadEagle the opportunity to delete video of the incident, in which I was first assaulted by her and was then sexually assaulted at quite some length by her partner and various confederates, which was then followed by a tissue of lies instigated by other cops and prosecutors who should not be allowed public funds for disseminating deliberate deceits in the name of justice: what is after all obviously of the remark that such despicable behaviour is perfectly capable of misleading any householder into domestic accidents without any other sort of hostile appertaining circumstance.

It is at the risk of sounding repetitive that I have to reiterate that in 2010 I was still desperately seeking to get various authorities to acknowledge what had happened on the night my father died, what being strikingly of the fact that the ER had called police owing to the homicidal behaviour of my younger paternal half brother and what being furthermore, of the simple remark that his actions constituted first degree murder. In very short, I had been desperate to get away from the makeshift and badly designed flat surrounded by traffic and noisy aircon units fifteen hours a day I had been stuck in as the result of ludicrous diversionary allegations made by my father whilst acting as his carer in 2002, this after several years of being completely preoccupied with diligently caring for him, a seriously criminally delinquent half brother, and a cousin of my father's whom I had correctly diagnosed as being afflicted with a very serious neurological condition despite what I understood were contrary official diagnoses of mild dementia. So, when in February of 2010 I got an offer of a place that was derelict and full of junk I took it assuming that it would at least have had the plumbing and electrics serviced.

As I have repeatedly explained, after breakdowns and accidents with plumbing for which I was told by the Landlord that they accepted responsibility they welched on a deal to do the place up by increasing the rent. As I had explained to the landlord/owner's representative whom I had assumed to be desperately short of money for his contractors to have most significantly left a certain overflow pipe blocked and disconnected, which was to say nothing about their having made ambiguous comments about it, I was allowed to earn £10 weekly without it affecting my benefits and I could undertake various tasks clearly being demanded by the neighbours in forthcoming years. In practice it did mean bending the rules in that I had to undertake something like a couple of months work just to make use of the space and I had reasoned that after about ten years it would have evened out. Whatever else might have happened to be a fact it was unquestionably the case that there was no way I could get any sort of legal assistance and I had no realistic choice but to undertake all sorts of work in order to make any sort of use of the place.

There seems little point in going over all the details again but the context is that regulations are 'de facto' unenforced and unenforceable like many laws in the UK. The owner's son did not respond to comment that he had agreed to an indefinite rent freeze and had various people from his office send me out figures about a rent shortfall which were meaningless without a reasonable discussion of the circumstances. The point as far as the narrative here and now is concerned is that among the irresponsible and unworthy remarks that were conveyed to me, were instructions to get out and return the keys once I had undertaken perhaps £3000 of work. Nothing would have pleased me more but I had spent what little I got from my father's will on gathering many tons of belongings from about a half dozen addresses whence they had been scattered in the run up to his decease. The point is to say that so much was crammed into the place was that under any circumstances I would have obviously had trouble keeping track of minor odds and ends but there seems no plausible reason to doubt that perhaps several padlock keys that went missing had in fact been purloined in an attempt to terrorise me into performing what was actually an impossible feat of moving elsewhere. 09 05 24

What is of seeking to reiterate that these dissertations on events are not some story which I have set out to try and amuse people but rather an attempt to make some sense out of public service failure since I was about school leaving age, in particular respect of the behaviour of solicitors, and in more recent respect of mental health issues and the performances and response of the Norfolk and Suffolk Health Trust. I had not originally set out to blame society or the government for very serious personal problems in schooldays, at least not until various public servants were failing to acknowledge them from my later teens. I really felt the way I was treated by Anthony Smythe the solicitor over the winter of 84-85 was utterly disgraceful, that it condemned me to a lifetime of dysfunction and cursed the nation to a creeping caustic criminality, when his interest should have solved those problems which had become most evident since my father's third 'de facto' marriage in the late seventies, it being the case that several strange and to say the least sleazy paternal liaisons/relationships had spanned my schooldays.

Most of the details have been gone over at quite some length before and since I first awoke one morning in 2004 and realised that a rather fraught dream was not a dream but a recollection of events from infancy that various people had clearly gone to immense lengths to persuade me I could not remember and very likely hoped I would never remember. I have quite a few snippets of memory that relate to the fact that a pair of dark and dark suited twins had appeared in the from room of a flat in Kent where I was born, and those which I have not yet aired may as I say be of interest to various parties.

I seem to recall that I did what toddlers do when they first learn to walk and talk and greet the world around them with friendly inquisitiveness, and that one of them which was presumably Reggie Kray rather than Ronnie, had said I had spoken to the wrong one if I wanted some kind of friendly or understanding response. This would of course in reality have been most likely directed at my father or grandfather since I do not think I was quite three years of age and I have to assume that my grandparents must have been firstly concerned to keep my father out of any more legal trouble than that which it seems reasonable to presume had already blighted his career. Other odd traces of memories that do seem to refer to the twins are not ordered or quite logically consequential. The narrative point is I suppose that I do not recall what if anything happened after this attempted friendly greeting beyond the fact my Aunt Bernadette had told me to go to sleep, and indeed as I say it would not be until 2004 that any recollection of it finally bubbled its way up into consciousness. I have now frequently commented that many may likely have thought I was deliberately keeping stum about these memories which were as I say in fact dormant until 2004: I was not aware until that time that I had such memories.

What was as I say of the fact that in the summer of 1970 at the age of six I had first found myself musing over a nasty little scar on my right palm with no recollection of how I came by it. My father had to my significant distress moved to a new job in Northumberland the previous year to which my mother had failed to follow us as he had said she would, and I could only then vaguely recall having been previously cared for by grandparents. It obviously does not now do me much good to consider the obvious point this was something to do with a shortage of money and cocaine. Various plausible legal ramifications have almost all expired with the passing of time and the decease of almost everyone involved. Immediate practical difficulties with accommodation are extreme, and the very few friendly acquaintances and relatives who might be willing to provide me with some assistance, are in general individuals who do not want appertaining intrigues dug up.

Be that as it may there are or perhaps rather were, several situations which seem rather linked to the fact that I have at least prior to 2004 been nursing a variant form of dissociative amnesia and/or anterograde amnesia that has very arguably had strange repercussions on my behaviour, such as an unusual inability to cope with social stress and uncommunicativeness. Whilst I obviously do largely want to put the past behind me and make what I can of what remains of my natural span, this is unrealistic without some explanation and legal resolution of the significance of these memories. The unfortunate fact is that as I have been trying to explain to my doctor, I can just about cope with the purely psychological aspects of these 'discovered memories,' but what is far more difficult to cope with is the real life situations that it is difficult to describe as other than spin off stories from the inevitable conclusions of what they add up to. This is perhaps most saliently in respect of the fact that when I was bawled out by my so called solicitor in 1985 I had something like a fit of mental paralysis which I obviously tend to suggest really does significantly ensue from an unadmitted childhood trauma rather than from any sort of significant personal iniquity. A lot could be said about that in psychological terms but the fact is that the principal consequence of him not acknowledging the context of my father's torrid and dysfunctional history was that I just went blank: this was ineffably absurd, preposterous beyond measure, and I was literally speechlessly horror struck.

Since the age of six I had been unmistakeably dogged by a sense of horror at some appalling flaw in my father's social and marital existence and the dawning fact it would be ten years before I could be shot of his delusions; at that age I only had some fleeting and scarcely conscious comprehension this was the case and it was not something I could then reason about at all in daily life beyond the inescapable if far from unusual observation he was not happy with the partner he had acquired in 1970. What was of having tried to explain to a school counsellor some ten years later that in everyone's interest and for everyone's benefit, my father's social delusions ought not to be allowed to govern my passage into adult life, and of apparently in practical terms having been ignored, in that I was allotted a Council Maisonette with him on the far side of town and far too late for it too have been of usefulness in relation to an education which had then been subverted by rapidly changing, dysfunctional and tawdry marital and domestic arrangements. That something was wrong with my memory is strikingly signified by the fact it was not until 2015 that I recalled having made a perhaps rather too realistic show of masturbating in a Biology class when a new lady teacher whom it seems is a relative of the late John Lennon arrived at secondary school in September of 77 and this may have been what preoccupied the Counsellor. The incident is one among only a very few at most in which I have evidenced anything at all in the way of noticeable psychological dysfunction and those seem now entirely explicable in terms of the fact of 'discovered memories.'

I did recall in 2015 that what had prompted it was rather an irritation at constantly having mysteriously broken ears when trying to listen properly rather than trying to be funny or having serious ambitions to become a gigolo, and the real point in relating the fact is to substantiate, in view of the fact I did not even find it lodged in my brain at the end of the lesson and didn't recall it until 2015, that I had been traumatised as an infant in some kind of scenario involving narcotics, money, and almost certainly less than thoroughly consensual sexual behaviour. In my first year at secondary school in Lancashire I had a young mother form teacher who seemed to very insightfully signal some concurrence that something was very badly wrong with my family situation. Once my grandmother had died and my father returned to Suffolk, within thirty minutes of commencing my second year I was picked up and thrown at a wall in his office by a large rugby playing Kraut teacher of whom I would hear that he was a son of Ernst Heinkel whom had been captured by tommies at the age of about three. The rest of my mandatory schooling became a squalid grubby nightmare and it ended with him cursing me and saying how much he hated me in front of a form class. When it is interestingly the case that he went by the name of Powell as did the female Inspector who masterminded a prosecution for a fictitious assault in 2010 and I obviously cannot help wondering if they are related.

In seeking to return to my legal problems the psychological point is that when my mother and her partner (who had invited themselves) to discuss the fact of my having technically burgled what was technically my own home in 1985 concurred with Smythe the solicitor that there was no relevant issue with my father, that my mind as I say just went into meltdown. I could not explain anything without reference to this, least of all as to why I had not made mention of thefts at school which I really felt I needed to do a long time since and which I really wanted to do. I was trying to be brutally realistic about my situation and had not felt able to make any responsible mention of crime whilst my father and guardian was refusing to discuss obvious references to it. I did what they then told me to do being under the impression I was being threatened with false testimony and summary imprisonment if I did not. I actually to this day know nothing about who emptied the Maisonette of a putative and defaulting lodger's goods. Within about three years I had protested in person to police that I was also being compelled to make fraudulent social security claims whilst under such threats and they told me to get on with it. I did the same in writing in the mid nineties and was ignored. Whilst I don't want to dump rubbish on people or present with awful social horror stories this does put them in much blame for what has subsequently occurred.

The immediate practical point is that I was firstly persuaded to abandon the Maisonette without any sort of relevant enquiry or demur and that this ramifies directly into the immediate and serious problem I face with a private landlord of some fourteen years standing who had secured a lot of work from me, especially during the earlier part of the tenancy on the basis that his contractors were responsible for a flooding that could without any real exaggeration, have caused the death of a small child, since they had made what were in fact ambiguous comments about unserviced plumbing. There is a fair bit been oft repeated in various documents on this site about the matter and the simple fact is that the damn place has been little more than a millstone around my neck. I had really needed to focus on personal and family business after my father died and instead I got caught up with endless further problems in a derelict flat that really needed much more fundamental work than redecoration.

26 11 24

A lot has been going on since I last made an entry not the least of which is of course the fact of another general election and another ludicrous gerrymandered result though this time the gerrymandering has spectacularly backfired in that labour only achieved a 1.6 % increase in its vote share. It is nice to see more LibDems and Greens in Parliament and there seems every reason to expect this will improve debate in some respects. I am a bit puzzled as to why Reform UK should have so catastrophically split the right wing vote but at least the fact now gives the right wing electorate some motivation to reform our ludicrous Victorian FPTP voting system with the unmistakeable message that if rightists want to get their way they are going to have to accept PR and spend more time taking an interest in local government which they significantly tend to abandon when they have contrived a parliamentary majority. New housing regulations are of no use to me as they would have been in 2001. I cannot now hope to compose my belongings into a self employed builder's portfolio or anything such as I then could because I am now simply too old, and even if the place I now occupy was fit to live in it is very arguably too small for anyone of more than average height to live in without becoming claustrophobic.

I am afraid I do not like the violent tone adopted by the right wing populist press in immediately harassing the government's attempt to do something different with economic policy, not for instance that I am any kind of a fan of the Naff Health Service: as a matter of fact I would be perfectly happy to see the Government sell it to Donald Trump for scrap value as it has done nothing but inflict severe mischief on my personal health throughout my lifetime. I really do not want to have to tell people that my personal wherewithal should come from the third of the NHS budget that gets spent on compensation but this is a matter beyond my control. I suppose the blame for my largely wasted life really lies with teachers, politicians and lawyers who have made up stories for convenience, or accepted stories that were convenient for others, instead of facing up to harsh truths and realities that I faced at school leaving age from my own point of view. The GP/family doctor I had in 1980 must have known how deranged and negligent my natural parents were, and should really have squished my father's attempt to book joint housing once I was seventeen, it being for example singularly the case that this was precisely too late to have facilitated learning anything at school and the obvious suspicion having been that he could not explain the context of his parenting without courting another prison sentence: neither of my parents had done anything for me beyond fostering unwholesome intrigues involving third parties whose interest when it was not thoroughly unwholesome was simply hostile. What is for example of the fact that my father had attacked me on a camping trip in I think it was 1980 tearing chunks out of my scalp and ripping my trousers off for the delectation of the onetime magistrate's daughter he was married to; I was therefore rather surprised to have in more years deduced that certain parties seemed to have been making a big deal out of the fact he had copped a decent fat lip some years later when screaming his head off about god only knows what when staying in a bedsit where I resided in 1991 or thereabouts. Of more general interest is the fact that my stepfather's warehouses had burned down in '82 some months after he had boasted about having sabotaged my sixth form career though the insurance baby was I believe passed on to a local businessman who had employed careless welders.

14 12 24

Continued relentless hacking and corrupting of documents on this site and my other routine online activity is not the only reason I have not been making entries throughout the latter part of this year. After several years of singlemindedly looking for somewhere to store my possessions and pitiful household as the lesser of evil choices, something barely affordable turned up during the latter part of the summer. What is of the remark that I am determined to go homeless given the nauseating and pauperising nature of the housing I have endured since 2010 in particular: that and the continuing contemptuous ignoring of my attempts to get the local police to react appropriately to the fact of crime. I do not know what will happen next and I do not care so long as I get away from the unsanitary derelict shambles that has been my so called home these last fourteen years or so. I had hoped to have gotten everything but camping, communications and survival equipment stored away before winter descended but alas it cannot be helped; I have gotten the task of abandoning the worthless squalid flat down to a few days work but as yet have no place where I might camp in some safety. I am really looking forward to being homeless instead of enduring this nauseating place and I am not the only one who finds official mismanagement of social affairs literally as bad as that. I ran across a friendly acquaintance from teenage years a couple of years ago and he related a similar story to my own referring neighbourhood crime problems as a reason for having spent seven years sleeping in a local hedgerow which is to say the least a very impressive feat of endurance and fortitude.

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Among items, comments, and pieces of information that seem to have disappeared from this document during the last few months, are references to the fact that I really had no trouble at all getting the local community to accept the story that the solicitor Smythe had refused to countenance early in 1985, and what is of reiterating that his refusal to honour my rights as a British citizen is as arrant a piece of knavery as can ever be offered a citizen by any sort of official. Another related piece of information was to the effect that in seeking to substantiate what might have seemed to be co-operating with thieves in schooldays rather stemmed from the fact that the only time I had ever been in any sort of legal trouble during schooldays led to me being subjected to a humiliating assault (held down and urinated on) by two boys who had inveigled me into joining them in climbing through an open workshop window near where I lived when I was ten years old after freely admitting I had been with them. I am having a lot of technical trouble presently and it really ensues from being completely sickened by new operating systems and upgrades after so much effort having been put in to learn how to use the last one. The point is to say that among other things I am completely mystified by the feature Onedrive and it is hardly an exaggeration to say that finding it appearing on my desktop has induced years of weeping and black depression. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it and it is nothing but a screaming pain the ass; neither do I want to sychronise my damned computers but trying to stop it from happening is a complete and utter waste of time. The relevant point is to say that Onedrive is trying to do something with my files despite the fact I have been trying to get rid of it since the first time I saw it and it might e.g. be preventing my text editor from functioning correctly.

That story does warrant a more detailed recapitulation than I can give it here and now but among the points worth reiterating are that it was not my idea and the fact I accepted some cans of fizzy drink that were found inside and foisted on me was arguably something I did with some reluctance. The point as far as my personal history in general is concerned is that the manner of the revenge attack may have been prompted by suspicions that my apparent or presumed parents may have been suspected with at least some justification, of being a bit too weirdly liberal for respectable comfort so to speak. I was not just jokingly pissed on I was held down by a much heavier individual Christopher, while the other, Gary calculatingly emptied his bladder in my face. I had never told anyone about it such was my horrified suspicions about my father in particular. In respect of the fact that my father was probably afraid to discuss such matters, what is of the concrete sort of fact that I was not going to make such comments about crime again until I was in charge of my own destiny in respect of domestic security, and of course I have never managed to get the only thing I ever really needed from the government which was a council flat some of which are quite good and affordable.

It is in this sort of context of the fact of the most curious sort of official misunderstanding of myself and of my circumstances that I refer back to the fact that subsequent to the fact of the death of my grandparents the only person I had any real sort of trust in was my father's sister. What was from the evening of my father's decease of surmising that there may have been something questionable about her inheriting the property my grandparents had acquired during their working lives, and of asserting that no-one else could really have effected such confusion on the part of social services and so on: it seems offhand the only really good explanation for endless petty looking dysfunctional details relating to my life story.

For example after my father returned to the country with his vile younger son in the later 90's, I had as I say been almost entirely preoccupied with trying to care for them and for a cousin of my father's one John French, whom I had correctly guessed was afflicted with a dangerous neurological condition, for several years during which time my paternal aunt vouchsafed not one single word of any sort whatever, despite the fact she was perfectly well able to do so having inherited (perhaps by hook and crook as I say) a detached des res at the age of about 33. It is fairly easy to imagine that if my grandmother had been thinking of perhaps not leaving her the whole thing and perhaps even making some provision for my entry into adult life, that she was also perhaps trying to conceal as had many, some history as a Nazi sympathiser, and had been driven to a premature demise by a resentful daughter she really wanted rid of.

Should there be significant truth in such a scenario my father obviously could not reference it without getting himself immediately carted back off to prison and much of his ludicrously dysfunctional behaviour may be explicable in terms of him hoping I might spontaneously come up with such a story. What is certainly of the remark that my paternal aunt did quite calculatingly and without any justifiable motive derail any chance I had of getting anything of useful value from my father's will whilst feigning an innocent bumbling incompetence. I would not therefore be at all surprised to learn that she had actually been under some investigation in respect of her mother's rather brief retirement it being the case for instance that as far as I know her several sisters all lived well into their eighties and nineties.

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In seeking to return to some sort of narrative there are a couple of main points to add to a meaningful recapitulation of events as they relate to the fact of what I have come to call my 'official existence' as it inevitably relates to people and events. The current view of crime as a social problem and crime statistics in respect of the day to day life of the nation was quite well analysed by a recent channel 4 Dispatches programme: Britain's unsolved crimewave. This gave a quite detailed and presumably unfortunately significantly accurate in some respects, perspective on expectations of how crime is dealt with in relation to the fact that for instance only one in ten reported crimes results in a prosecution, as well as other facts that tend to be viewed as uncomfortable in terms of middle-class voter friendly norms and values, involving no-go areas and crime blackspots, especially in relation to bicycles and mobile phones in urban areas. Some of the crimes focused on in respect of bicycles particularly, tend to reflect the often obvious fact that the government cannot in general terms, consistently spend more on solving crime than it for example it costs to ignore: this might tend to go with more general observations about shifting ideological perceptions about crime in that people often mean very different things when for example they talk about justice. From a more practical perspective and in respect of hopes for anything like solutions for various sorts of crime problems and effective action on the part of public servants, it is to be hoped that increased spending might engender some willingness to admit the mistakes of the past at least in order to avoid repeating them.

From a personal point of view having gone as far as I have with some attempt to describe the social and legal problems I continue to face, what is realistically of the fact I cannot just suddenly desist even though it is no longer convenient for me or perhaps I should say the least inconvenient. I have to persist in trying to have my legal advice called into question, even though it is going to be increasingly irrelevant in terms of possible outcomes. That my percipience might not be entirely flawed could seem instanced by the fact my comments about the erstwhile local Tory MP Dan Poulter having presaged his defection from the Tories within weeks; among other things I had been very surprised to hear that MP's frequently have second jobs as if being an MP was not somehow important enough. The observation really begets in terms of difficult remarks about my mother in particular, foremostly that she was supposed to have confessed what she and her partner related to the solicitor Smythe at the end of 1984, to the then Tory MP for Ipswich one Michael Irvine in 1992 when she insisted on taking some interest in my having managed to get on to a full time education course that year.

Saying that it is a matter of unusual contemporary significance given the fact of a very new government with ambitions to make public services work well very much betokens that it arguably should seek to understand the mistakes of the past before anything else. The concept of a National Health Service that does more than provide eye glasses, extract bad teeth and plaster up the odd broken bone is relatively new and misunderstood both by those who give and those who receive. Trying to write well enough as to maintain the interest of those not directly affected or involved as a minor sort of social and political commentary is of course for me personally a very significant challenge in itself but in theory I should just about be up to it. More than forty years have passed since I found myself relating to student contemporaries that I had thought I was going to be housed in my own right and some reiteration of what had actually happened entails the remarks that I was in the process of finding out that senior teachers did not tend to think of going out of their way to help sixth formers with accommodation issues and that I was also being overoptimistic about the hope of getting somewhere to live that did not involve my father's mysterious self obsession and delusory expectations.

Whatever else that might reasonably be said about it the fact that I found myself miles away from anyone friendly or familiar on the far side of town in a maisonette he had booked for us jointly was suspiciously ill timed in that it was the first time in my life that I had lived somewhere with enough interior space to study at all, and one has to think this piece of ill fortune coming as it did at precisely the time I was refused a full sixth form scholarship, may have stemmed from the fact my father could not explain certain matters in detail to discriminating teachers and academics. In view of the fact eg that I need to make some kind of an effective summing up of a few matters, it being the case if I am to enter into a state of effective homelessness, in addition to other difficulties which seem the result of malicious activity I will also have much more difficulty simply getting online. If it was ever less than entirely pointless trying to maintain a domestic focus enabling serious work at this place it has been since someone started playing squash for at least several hours a day in the flat below about four years ago. All I need is somewhere to camp that is not ridiculously hazardous: I just about have all the bits and pieces I would need and I am quite looking forward to the thought having gotten what was an enormous task to remove and put in storage many tons of goods in recent months down to a couple of days work for two people with a van. It is very much among options to be considered that I at least happen to have a motorbike and a full set of gear for travelling and that despite the fact it is the wrong time of year this allows for much flexibility of action.

Whilst it does not likely make much sense to a casual reader the remarks about my personal and social history two threads of commentary might seem to present themselves and they ought be juxtaposed into a further comment about some of the people involved in events I have described which arguably might involve a sensational looking coincidence that will interest many though my immediate purpose herewith, is rather to try and set the scene with various local authorities and officials for that which may ensue from my actually being able to refuse to reside in this place given the mini apocalypse that has struck my attempt to run a household in for the last fifteen years.

On the one hand I cannot entirely avoid studying the suggestion that the sinister sort of chaos attached to my attempts to compose personal official business and a personal existence, does have to some extent a meaningful causal explanation in the historical and political realities of my paternal family having significantly been seen to have been a/the focus for anti-appeasement at a critical moment in time. I really do not want to dwell on it or even credit the idea at all; many people were in many respects significantly a focus for resistance to fascist/nazi tyranny and many swiftly lost their lives. All things are connected to all things and I do not want to end up pointlessly theorising about and analysing what I know in the search for explanations as for instance it is probably a reasonable comment to say that most of the people significantly involved in framing saliently the world wars and the holocaust, even those who managed to get themselves written up as the 'good guys' have in many respects sought to obscure the simple bare fact of a general failure of understanding and diplomacy having repeatedly led to enormously expensive global conflict.

It is perhaps more immediately apparent that my dysfunctional personal history does occur in precise parallel to the evolution of the contemporary Irish troubles not that I would quite compare my woes to those who have been directly involved to the extent of having lost friends and relatives. I rather tend to suggest that it might be meaningful in terms of a failure to solve problems going right back to the later sixties when the troubles blew up again insofar as for example there might seem to have subsequently been too much of an assumption being made by local officials in respect of housing, education and welfare that various of voices having apparently some legitimate interest must have some motive for solving those problems. It is certainly unavoidably interesting that the Brighton Hotel Bomb went off when it might have seemed I had been prematurely groomed for a role endorsing our fptp democracy. Having recently sought to significantly question the role of my father's sister in certain events not the least of which was his death I find that I am also having to question views of my mother insofar as she did grow up in a savage unpleasant Irish orphanage and I am still trying to fathom her behaviour as not so much unpredictable in the sense of being dramatic but rather of being undecipherable. I am not obsessed with relatives or making comments about relatives but my father insisted on making arrangements thus at school leaving age that have always gone uncriticised even by agencies that were supposedly relevant only to my own welfare and my mother insisted on making statements and fashioning arrangements some thirty months or so after he suddenly vanished into the far-east. These have dominated the course of my life and rather by reason of the fact no-one else at all capable of meaningfully assisting in any way did take an interest particularly as 1984 became 1985 rather than it occurring as the result of any friendly sort of interested willingness on my part.

In seeking to shed some light on these events it may have been noted by an attentive reader that I had recently tried to spell out to the older of two half brothers of my mother's partner how I had interpreted what our mother and his father had said to the solicitor Smythe that winter and something of as to how this has afflicted consequent actions and events. What was of the fact he was now plenty old enough to at least acknowledge some comprehension of some of this and much more besides. Despite the fact I thought this and much of the detail of what I had to say was an unfortunately necessary and overdue sort of evil for which I was not really responsible, what I got was a drunken sort of threatening abusive tirade and what is of the fact it does all too arguably have some plausible motive involving the singular prerequisite fact that the very existence of these half siblings depended on some sort of whitewash of the story of how I came by a little scar on my right palm. When it is obviously a fact as far as they are concerned that any sort of detailed and perhaps belated exposition of the fact that some absent minded welders had occasioned the destruction by fire of warehouses under his auspices in some respect in 1982 is a big fat nono: I had not heard that anyone I knew was connected to the conflagration in question until about 1990 which is again arguably very unsurprising given the logical sort of causal suspicion.

Sowing a lot of detail into the narrative might be ambitious and fairly irrelevant to many but it arguably might be worth doing in terms of improving some local dialogue. What is of the fact he was only about ten in 1984 and might have to be forgiven any misunderstanding at that point but it is interestingly the case that by about 2014 the suggestion had emerged that the Labour members who had arranged to have one of their number call where I was living at the age of fifteen shortly after my father's thirdish marriage had collapsed with him in his sister's bungalow were a husband (now deceased) and wife by the name of Mackay who were well known as being at the centre of pro labour progressivist political activity and agitation in the Borough and the coincidental fact was/is that they also taught my putative stepfather's children in local Catholic Schools. It is very much to the point to suggest that regardless of the truth about any meaningful historicity in my own story, it being among other things the case for instance that if this were meaningful it would certainly have been appraised by various plausibly unhelpful parties as far back as my infancy, and the point of referring to this being to raise the suggestion or observation that he and those maternal half siblings had arguably managed to neatly sidestep a lot of pauperising political rhetoric on their way to conventionally successful careers.

In 1980 I had thought we had been approached by some kind of high minded city father sort of characters who wanted to prevent my father making the dysfunctional arrangements that he did in respect of accommodation and eg I do not really know the Thai woman he is supposed to have legally married and disappeared with soon thereafter. I was not really that interested in drinking underage and scoring dope for the comrades and I definitely did obtain within a couple of years the impression that what I had encountered was much more something like unconcerned have a go harrys spinning stories with little wholesome substance for the benefit of a monarchy which had always seemed quite distant to a comprehensive school pupil in the seventies. Another recent Dispatches programme for channel 4 which is about the most socially realistic sort of reporting we get on our mainstream tv channels nowadays focused on the amount of income the royal duchies are not paying tax on with a few embarrassing cameos with charity and public service reps complaining that their attempts to serve the public are rather hampered by the fact of them having to pay market rents to their patrons on the basis of some obtuse medieval precedent. What actually struck me about the programme overall was that it seemed to significantly explain some of the quaint sort of conservative consumerism that seems to pervade our daily lives. I daresay one could easily make up various portrayals of the usefulness of the royal family or lack of it in various respects as for instance I do think they pay some useful significant role in drawing attention to environmental issues on some of their estates but they are also considered habitual lawbreakers by some of those protecting birds of prey for instance. Saying so tends to conveniently broach the fact of statistical reality in terms of government social policy of how it is supposed to relate to ideologically recognisable thinking within the political nation and of the fact this is actually important, in respect of the fact eg that government housebuilding initiatives can only have a minimal impact on overcrowding in southern England and do not seek to answer question marks about an environmentally apocalyptic scenario already all too arguably in a state of existential development.

Perhaps the best way of getting round to the next comment is by pointing out that the site's opening remark is still essentially as it was when I first uploaded the first original version back in the nineties: among other things it is difficult to credit that many serious and adult people were not even born. The point is rather that the remark included an ironic reference to the likelihood of some kind of plague apocalypse; this at the time was more like a philosophical expression than some kind of weird prediction or an attempt to be whimsically dark in some manner. Anyhow the interesting point is as far as for instance we do not live in a perfectly ordered society and one's ability to relate truths conveniently in personal terms is not what it was when one had comparative youth, it seems I cannot but return to the fact of it not having been denied by these half siblings that their father's verbal had left my diagnosis of an Aunt's partner's terminal condition verbally unremarked about ten years before he was given a month to live. The crowning remark in looking around at a certain recent pandemic is the interesting coincidence appertaining the fact that the younger of these two half-brothers, at least in general terms, happens to work for Chinese owned biotech. Now I have to admit I do not know anything much more than that and at second hand, so I cannot really comment in any respect as to precisely how interestingly coincidental that may happen to be in respect of how closely that might align with allegations of serious accidental and intentional instances of bum steering on their part, rather than in respect of the fact I made some tasteless joke about someone releasing a devastating plague when I first thought to run up a website where I could expose the realities of what had been obtained in the public interest from the solicitor Smythe, which in 1985 had occurred significantly at his/their parents' promptings. A final absurd comment is that a working hypothesis might factor in some suggestion that if these happenings are meaningfully connected that an essential element of the/a concatenation of conspiring circumstances might include these half brother's having perhaps clumsily stumbled into the light of my own destiny before I had even opened my eyes: but that is of course absurd is it not?